adult, black-and-white, body

“Mentally broken.”


Have you ever had a moment of or moments in your life where you think something internally is wrong, but isn’t? I have spoken in the past about being a hypochondriac, where you might make something small and meaningless into something much bigger. For me, it has always been health, and I probably couldn’t be any healthier. Well, what is it, what has me thinking about poor health even in good health? Better yet, why do any of us build in our minds that we are worse off than we are in life. There are so many people with real problems, and here you are worry about nothing. So many sick people truly wish they could be in my shoes right now.


The fear that you are in poor health is actually a few factors. One of the reasons has to do with the idea that you fear tomorrow and the day after that, and so on. Meaning, the fear of aging is on so many people’s minds. We sometimes hope that we are sick so that we don’t have to deal with the idea of losing people close to us. But dying for you so young hurts so many people that it almost becomes selfish on your behalf to feel that way. Another fear comes from maybe not wanting to die, but the idea of dying never accomplishing your goals. So many are cut short of what they strive to become, and those are the stories that hurt the most. Other fears can also come into play as well: not amounting to what others may think of you, not wanting to live in financial straights, and fear of having too many expect too much of you and not being able to live up to the expectations.


Now, in dealing with these mental-emotional issues, you have to keep yourself busy with something you love in life. Because death is the inevitable, we all are going to perish one day. And constantly thinking about it can be a sign that ones life is empty. That is not to be mistaken with not having anything to do. It just means you need another outlet that will take your mind off of always thinking of the end. Yet, once you lose someone close to you, it becomes harder to push into the back of your mind. But controlling the mind will help you maintain your sanity and stress levels.

My Personal Website: www.faheemjackson.squarespace.com

Instagram Me: @theefaheemjackson

Twitter Me: @2320howe

Tumblr Me: @fjackson44

Facebook Fan Page: www.facebook.com

Author: faheemjackson44

I am from Racine, Wisconsin where I was raised until I graduated high school back in the year 2006. That entire time growing up in my mother's house, I was a student athlete. My goal was to embark on a general business career or athletics. But injuries through sports stopped a sports path, so I decided upon business with a focus in marketing. While attending undergraduate school at University of Wisconsin-Parkside, I began to write screenplays in my senior year. At first it was for fun, but I quickly learned writing allow me to transfer negative energy into characters I created. This led to a decrease in depressing mood swings, which in turn boosted my quality of life. After undergraduate school in May of 2011, I move to New York City for graduate school. While pursuing my MBA, I continued to write screenplays, but always wanted to write novels as well. I finished graduate school back in the year 2014, but wrote screenplays until I began thinking of my first short film, first First Day Fears. While finishing my fifth feature length screenplay, I started to write my first novel this year. So far, I have finished my first short film and working on my next one (Freedomless Speech), and recently self published my first novel (The Boy Who Could Talk To God) and short stories book (Faheem Jackson Short Story Collection Volume 1). My feature length screenplays have been put on temporary hold to finish my short films and books, but I am making good progress on my sixth feature length screenplay. With year 2017 ending, I am currently writing my novel Precinct 86 and Faheem Jackson Short Story Collection Vol. 2. I have started teaching myself photography since 2018, along with my videography, podcast later on, and more research for my filmmaking.


  1. I never thought of hypochondria as a push towards ‘living in the now’ but I like that point of view. Personally I have been thinking a lot lately about what I really want in my life and how to make that actually happen. Not just dreaming anymore, but actually doing. Maybe next time I start poking at my neck and wondering if that lump is a tumor or focusing on my latest injury I should create a list of what I want my life to look like and what can I do RIGHT NOW to make that happen.

    Using aches pains and reminders of the end to be as the meditation bell, and come back to this moment. What do I want and what is stopping me from creating it?


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s