SELFISH ME: WHY YOU SHOULD BE A DICTATOR WITH YOUR LOVE

Silhouette of Man Touching Woman Against Sunset Sky

“Only to those who deserve it.”


In life, when dealing with people no matter what the relationship capacity, you must be a dictator with your love. And what do I mean by being a dictator with your love? I mean you must be very authoritative, and translate to people what it is you want and expect. And if they are not willing to meet you there, then you must move on from them. Because you only have one life to live, and you don’t want to waste it on people not worthy of your time and occupying your space. Some call it acting funny; well, good. Humans have been around for ions of time. And the fact that you only have on average 78 years on this planet means you should spend your time well. Make whatever time you have on Earth count. So when people mean you no good, get rid of them.

Like I said before, you will lose people. But that is an aspect of life the comes with maturing; it’s called widening the gap. You start at a certain point with each other and along the journey you elevate. And the way for you to come to where the people you left behind are, is to come down. Now you’re compromising your time, space, energy, love, and overall existence. And you shouldn’t be compromising because you’re living the best you and running your race in life. They are the ones who should be rising to the occasion. Why are you the one sacrificing for them, when you have a mission on this planet. Now you can slow down while you’re running your race, but if you are passed by, then don’t complain. Because you were in the race, but you chose to slow down. Everyone has to grow up and become an adult. It’s not your job to raise people.

This is all why you must be such a dictator with your love. Everyone is not meant to be in your life. With that said, you must also learn the art of not giving a “F**k.” Love no one more than you love yourself, and be righteous when you say it as well. Those who understand that you are heading in a positive way and use that as a platform to propel themselves will understand. Because people who are of this mind will flock in and around each other. But those who are just in it for hanging around and occupying time won’t. They want to be in your life as part of the finished product that is you; the more polished you. But they are the ones who are not willing to get their hands dirty in the architectural building of you.

So in the end, you must be very selfish with who you give yourself to. You might have thought this topic was going to be about dating. But it’s more than just dating. It’s for dating, friendships, family, and strangers you come in contact with in life. When you let people occupy your space that aren’t worth your time, you do yourself an injustice. They mean you no good, and can only hurt your growth in the long run. So dump them and dump them fast, or watch yourself unravel along with them.


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LIFESTYLE CHANGES: CHANGING THE FOOD WE EAT

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“Your body is a machine, keep it clean.”


Recently, I have been thinking about making a lifestyle change regarding the food I consume. And it’s not because my health is bad, I just would like to try something new. I thought about trying a raw diet or even becoming a pescetarian for a while. I love eating seafood, so becoming a pescetarian would actually be easy. But since I was a baby I have had a diet that consisted of eating meat. And to add to it, it’s part of the culture that I grew up in as a child. Meat was so part of our daily intake, I don’t know if I could give it up at all. But some people have never even had meat a day in their lives. It was just how they were raised. But not me, I grew up in a family that we had more meat than side dishes.

Now if you’re one of these animal lovers, then you would hate to be apart of my family. But just because you eat meat does not mean you hate animals. As people on Earth we have had to survive off of the land as much as possible. That includes any creature that inhabited the land. And given we had to feed so many people, animals were the meal. But vegetarians and pescetarianism has been an aspect of society for forever. You just now have this wave of people who are going back to eating less meat. And it does not have anything to do with preserving the animals on our planet. It has everything to do with health. When eating meat you have a digestive tract that consist of thin lining. And meat pushing through that track is hard to digest. So eating too much meat, especially the tougher the meat, makes digesting more difficult.

Now, with digestive problems comes illnesses because meat lying in the tract for too long causes problems in the intestines. Over time, you start to develop sicknesses because the meat is basically rotting inside of your body. So people have become aware of this and have made moves to eat less meat if any at all. It just makes sense considering we want to prolong our lives as much as possible because this is our only life to live. And caring for yourselves is what we must do for longevity. There is no guarantee, some people eat healthy and still die of sicknesses. But the point is to care anyways because it’s about playing the odds. And in the end, my thoughts of changing my dining choices comes from better eating habits. I just turned thirty years old last week. This is best time to start eating differently because staring later in your forties could be too late.


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THE STORM BEFORE THE CALM: HOW THE UNITED STATES IS SO MAD BECAUSE IT’S GETTING BETTER

Brown and Beige Wooden Barn Surrounded With Brown Grasses Under Thunderclouds

“The fight among ourselves is as volatile as the weather.”


America has always dealt with issues socially in our country. As with any country, there are issues in the past, in the present, and will be in the future. But the more recent problems that have popped up into existence in the news are decades, even a few centuries old. And those issues are race, gender, sexual orientation, and religion. You would think that these would be non-issues considering the United States government signed the Civil Rights Act of 1968. But just because you sign an act that keeps business, organizations, and schools from discriminating, it doesn’t change the people. People in society will always have bouts with each other over so many mundane topics. But is it going to really always be like this, or is it the storm before the calm rather than the usual phrase of the calm before the storm? Maybe this is the beginning of real change in America.

Because looking at America is like looking at how forest fires typically take place. A lot of the times, forest fires are sporadic, and seem to happen out of nowhere. But what’s interesting about forest fires, is that they burn everything, then lay down the foundation for new brush to grow from the area that was previously destroyed. And I thought that to be interesting considering America is that type of country. We burn things down, and once they burn we look back and realize, you know, that should have been burned down. Because we have something so much better that we live by now, it make the past seem ridiculous to go back. Now, you’re going to reach everyone, but it’s not about reaching everyone. It’s about creating the most stable environment for everyone to inhabit. And as longs as that stability is there, we have ground for something much better in the future. Are there any other reasons we fight because things are getting better?

Yes, we also tend to fight because there are people who remember a time where they didn’t have to work as hard, or even have their beliefs challenged. The way things were in the past was what it was, and no one dared to challenge. Now, you’re watching your word get challenged constantly. And you’re also unable to explain yourself because you never had to explain yourself. So you push back against the new ways simply because you see it as you becoming irrelevant. And no one wants to of themselves as irrelevant or outdated. Because this means you don’t have importance anymore. The landscape looks foreign to you, so you feel like you’re losing something. And in the end, this is what it all boils down to; winning and losing. People in America have this feeling that we are losing something in life. No matter how big or little, there was a time that benefited some and not others. And when you feel that is in jeopardy people begin to lose their cool. But as we look back over time, we begin to look at life differently.


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SOCIAL MEDIA MADNESS: HOW SOCIAL MEDIA HAS BECOME THE NEW HYSTERIA

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“Too much social media forces you to be less social.”


 The personal computer was first designed as this educational tool for people in society. And since the advent of the internet, it has become this machine that got away from everyone. But once social media started to take hold, everything has began to go haywire. And why is that? Well, the main reason is because everyone in society today is allowed to have an opinion. It used to be in the past that having an opinion existed, but it wasn’t taken at such face value unless it came from more qualified people. Now, anyone who builds themselves a platform can speak to the masses. And not only speak to the masses, but also be taken seriously. But what is it about the social media landscape that causes the hysteria? For starters you have to understand us as people. This is a basic layout of who we are.

People are these emotional creatures who feel just because we have an emotion, it automatically means something. And that feeling is broad and changes constantly, which is why so many of our human emotions don’t mean anything. If you’re passionate about ten things, then three or four are important; maybe even less. But in the society we live in today, everything is supposed to be important. If I have ten things that are important to me, then all ten mean something. So when you turn on the computer, on top of the 24 hour news cycle, you have a constant reminder of how important all these things are to you. It’s to consistently keep your attention, but it inevitably creates more anxiety and depression. It speaks so much to the human psyche because everything is urgent, breaking news, or special report. All three aspects of life that make us panic when we think of anything important.

And on top of the importance you have people in society who want to be mad. In the past, people who were mad, just were mad. Now there is an outlet that allows them to have voice and these people are letting everyone hear their voices. They’re able to do so with social media, and we are listening. They know we are listening and they get louder by the day. So we look at all the news we are constantly bombarded with, and their hate comments, that we began to feel depressed ourselves. A seemingly happy person instantly becomes unhappy. And in the end, the hysteria comes from watching and reading so much on television and the internet. What has been created to inform us is making us depressed. So if you want to decreases your odds of going crazy, you have to disconnect every now and then.


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red, white, and BLUES: HOW WE ARE SLOWLY STRIPPING EACH OTHER OF FREEDOM

Image result for nfl

“Break free from yourself.”


It has become redundant at this point, but another issue has spiraled out of control regarding President Donald Trump. This time it took place between him and players of the National Football League. This past weekend, he made comments in Huntsville, Alabama before a crowdd of his supporters regarding their protesting on the football field during the National Anthem. And the response was, as you guessed it, swift and wide spread. Because the very next day you saw over 200 players and team owners locking arms and dropping to one knee in solidarity with each other. So the response from those on the opposite side of the the protest say, “Well, we’ll show you by not patronizing football.” And the only issue with that form of protest is the flip side which is to come after you once again. Now as I sit here typing, I can’t help but to be shocked by rights we are taking away from each other. And might ask how are we doing so.

Well, I remember not even a year ago when political commentary Anne Coulter wanted to speak at Berkeley University in California. The uproar over her coming to the campus led to vandalism and rioting. The upheaval caused the event to be discontinued. Then as Colin Kaepernick took his knee to protest police brutality in America, he was ostracized in the same manner as Anne for his freedom of Image result for ann coulter berkeleyprotest. And to me the losers in all this are the American people. Not for going against the two individuals, but the fact that we are willing to attack each other’s rights because we disagree. You may not like what someone says or does, but I was under the impression that as long as no one is being physically harmed what’s the problem. Because we attack everything that is offensive to us, then everyone will be out of jobs. Since what offends us is so broad and ambiguous in our society. What is offensive to you might not be offensive to me and vice versa.

And where does it lead to next. If the people push back against the NFL, and NFL forces players to stop, then what. Now it leaves people on the conservative side open. Because it won’t stop there, it will be this constant ping pong game. And like I said prior, the only people getting hurt are the countless people that represent organizations Image result for freedomsthat don’t make big money who could lose their jobs because of the constant fighting. But that is something that does not seem to sink into the minds of so many people. We hurt those, who for the most part just want to work and make it home to their families. I’m not saying that we should stop giving our opinions, I’m simply saying, everything is not meant to be fighting. What ever happened to the right to be offended. If you don’t like something, disconnect.

And in the end, that is the main problem. People hate to have something they feel passionately about go on deaf ears. But is it real passion, or just a reason to be mad. You never know because no one is honest with how they truly feel. But why are people losing everything they work for because I disagree. I pride myself on being more liberal than conservative. But I am not compelled to boycott someone just because I don’t like what they speak about or protest. We have become our own enemies. With a $700 billion defense budget to protect us against so much, it is internal where the main problems lie today.


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SELECTIVE ACCOUNTABILITY: HOW WE TRANSFER RESPONSIBILITY TO SOME AND NOT OTHERS

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“I did that and assume responsibility.”


Ever watch television and you hear newscasters saying how much people in the public eye need to be held accountable. And what’s funny about them is if you state that they are held to the same standard, they dismiss what you are saying to them. Like people on CNN and FOX News, they are public figures in a celebrity way, yet they try to dismiss their celebrity under the guides of members of the press. But they truly are public figures just as much as any athlete or entertainer. And that’s when you realize that we all try to hold someone accountable, but then shift the blame when it’s time for ourselves or someone close to us. Because if it’s us or someone close to us, or even people we support in society, there is always this spin to how we rationalize. We say things like, “Well, they’re different.” “Or, you make certain amount of money.”

So why do we have a spin to our personal agendas? One reason is because by definition, an agenda is an ideological plan implemented to come to an agreement of meeting an objective. Which is a broad and ambiguous meaning for a word. But the real hidden aspect of an agenda are the “held common beliefs.” And that is something in society which makes the agenda become a problem. Because the group of people pushing any agenda today does so that it supports its own interest and not necessarily the interest of everyone. And here lies the reason why it’s hard to hold someone or groups of people accountable for their actions. It’s because once you pick a side, you usually stand firm on that side. And refusing to bend or break is the way we go about handling the situation. But at times you become so convinced of your belief in your agenda, you lose rationale and easily become taken down a rabbit hole.

And the rabbit hole is what happens when you say things like, “Athletes are held to certain level of accountability.” “But then turn around and say my national newscaster is giving the news so it’s different when they speak.” When in reality, your newscaster may be held to an even higher level of accountability and should, than the entertainer. It’s an easy out, and the ability to not have to have a conversation about a topic, or even the fact that you are trying to keep people from reading into who are as a person. And we don’t like to say, well I do that as well, and I am going to make the leap to change because I expect that from other people. No, we say it’s different, but it’s really not different. We just don’t want to change and we hide behind what we expect from you to mask who we really are behind closed doors.

In the end, we all have these accountability issues as it pertains to ourselves or other people. And a lot of it has to do with our belief systems. We want so dearly to believe that what we believe matters. So if what I believe matter, then what am I left with. Inevitably we hold people to a task we don’t hold ourselves to, or those close to us.


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I’M NOT QUIET OR LONELY, JUST IN THOUGHT: WHY DO WE ASSUME INTROVERTED IS UNHAPPY

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“Being to yourself gives you time to reflect.”


A lot of people throughout my life have told me that I am an introverted person. They have asked me why am I so stand off-ish or why do I like being so lonely. But there is a reason why I have become the person that I am today. For starters, I am an introverted person, but I am not stand off-ish nor am I lonely. Because stand off-ish people are unaware of self so they have a hard time in conversations with substance. And there is also a vast difference between someone who is alone and lonely. I am a person who spends time alone, but I am far from lonely. But how does a person be alone and not lonely? Aren’t they one of the same? Yes, they are, but to an extent. So why do we perceive people to be lonely and stand off-ish, or even disconnected when they don’t converse as much?

Well the reason we give people these types of labels has a lot to do with being human. When you are a human, we all want and yearn for some level of companionship in our lives. It can come in many different forms: doesn’t matter if it is a pet or a friend, or even a monogamous relationship. We all want to be close to someone or something that makes us feel like we exist on Earth. But you can also have people around you and still feel alone and shut out. Well, how is that the case? It’s because not everyone is meant to be in your life. And you should really assess who you allow into your space before you make the leap to bring them close to you. These people not meant to be in your life are the leaches who will suck you for everything you got, and then they’re gone once they have what they have come for.

Another reason why we look at people who are to themselves as lonely is because it’s what is associated with depression and anxiety. People who suffer from these illness typically exemplify the characteristics of a person who is lonely. They feel uncomfortable when put in social settings because of their own insecurities. So they typically shy away from people and keep to themselves. And there is a great deal of truth to this claim. Because I am a person who has been kept back because I have dealt with these internal issues in my life. Throughout life, I have been self conscious, depressed, lacked confidence, and anxious. So a lot of times I strayed from so many social situations because I felt this way. But it wasn’t until I became an adult I realized who I really was: which goes back to what I said earlier about self awareness. And that is the key to understanding yourself and others to understands themselves as well.

In the end, I have learned a few things by being alone. I have learned to have a great deal of patience because the solitude forces you to be still. You’re in a space alone with your own thoughts. So you have to do a lot of reflecting on your life. You have to look up until this point in life and be happy with where you are and where you are going. This is the moment you become self-aware. I also learned to have an objective opinion because I am not dealing with only the intricacies of my own peer group. So being around different people than myself in society allows me to be more practical. I am not a loner, I am reflecting; I am not lonely, I have plenty of people who love and care about me; I am introverted, but only because I have looked deep within self to find my purpose driven life; and I am not stand off-ish, I just usually stray away from conversations when I have nothing of substance to add. But what I have learned, is that the more time progress, the more people learn about me, the more they understand and respect who I am.


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