FED UP: WHY BLACK WOMEN HAVE CHOSEN TO BE WITH NON BLACK MEN

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“Slim options, forced to keep an open mind.”


Over the recent years, interracial dating and marriage have climbed in the African American community. And for the longest it was the men who were opting to date outside our ethnicity, but now it’s more women. So what has taken hold, is this just some coincidence, or is there another reason as to why? The answer is yes, from what I have noticed for the most part, there is a reason for this jump cross racial lines lately. And don’t get me wrong, interracial dating and marriage is nothing new in America, but I have seen the rise over time. And there are some clear indicators as to why these numbers have risen. Reasons for dating outside are due to environment in which you were raised or currently reside, options when choosing to date or marry, and off balanced numbers of Black women to men.

The first reason why Black women have chosen to date outside their ethnicity points to the environment where they grew up and/or live now. Black people who are generally raised in predominantly White communities tend to date within that given community. Not the least bit odd because you tend to marry in life what is within your immediate community. So if there are Black women who grew up in these White populated neighborhoods, they are more likely to marry White men. Or, if they are living in a community where these are the men around, this is who they most likely will gravitate toward. Which leads me into the other reason why Black women are now dating more outside their ethnicity; options.

And I don’t mean options as them expressing their options to date and marry. I’m referring to the availability of Black men for Black women to date. The most educated block of women in America are now Black women, while Black men sit at the bottom of society. So that in itself is enough to make so many Black women choose to be with men outside the community. Also within the options is the place at which Black women may be financially and socially versus where he might be at the moment. We have more and more Black professional women in the workforce, surrounded by predominantly White males in power positions. So if you’re a woman, you think to yourself, I would prefer someone in the same position as myself. But who do you date when everyone else is choosing within their ethnicity and you’re stuck single; you choose whoever comes along.

But when looking at why Black women are choosing to date outside their ethnicity, you look at the numbers alone and there are way more Black women than men. As matter of fact, millions more. And then when you factor into the equation that so many Black men are incarcerated, not in college, not going to college, not in the employment pool, in the employment pool, but barely surviving, then you can’t blame Black women for their choices. The numbers are so titled, that it’s almost as if you have to encourage interracial dating for Black women to have a chance. But in the end, could this just be in Black women’s heads because White women themselves are waiting, generally for a White male. Also is it always a conscious decision for Black women to date outside her ethnicity, or dating who approaches you. Whatever the case may be the numbers are still climbing, and Black women are becoming more and more open.


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