INTERNAL DUNGEON: HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A DARK PLACE

adult, alone, black and white

“Fear, hurt, guilt, anguish; just to name a few.”


Waking p everyday, not knowing what tomorrow will bring. Unsure about your future, and not knowing what direction to take in life. You are in pain, so hurt that you don’t know how much longer you could possibly go on. And on top of it all, you start to contemplate what life would be like if you weren’t alive. That my friend is when you realize that you are living in a very dark place. Whose been in a dark place before? A place so dark that you can’t see your hand outstretched in front of you. Where did it come from and how did you manage to overcome such emotion. So many people on a daily basis battle with this feeling. I know about the feeling because I have, and at certain moments of my life, still feel the darkness. But those moments are not as prevalent today as ther were in the past.

For me at least, I was coming from undergraduate school into to graduate school not really knowing what I wanted to do in life. After college, there is a major drop off point from going to school. You have all these ideas of what you’re going to be doing once school ends. Then school ends and you’re thrown into the thralls of society. Thrown out there with a bunch of wolves who are used to fending for themselves. They were afraid like me once, but they have adjusted and are ready to devour me as I come into the game. And on top of that, you struggle with identity: as a man, in success, and in mental strength. Then I found writing, and it turned me on to a new world. A world of transparency, where I could otherwise not have been transparent previously. Writing is a skill that you are able to fully express yourself, where verbally I was unable to do so.

So in your life, what place were you at, and how did you manage to overcome that deep dark place? Hopefully there were was no physical harm to ones self that came with the darkness. See, there’s a lot of guilt that comes with darkness. Guilt that you might be living a life you know very well you shouldn’t be living. Fears that plague you because you are so unaware of what lies in the future. And the internal pain you feel when you have lost confidence in your ability to progress. In the end, being in a dark place does not have to be permanent. You still have time to save yourself from yourself.


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Author: faheemjackson44

I am from Racine, Wisconsin where I was raised until I graduated high school back in the year 2006. That entire time growing up in my mother's house, I was a student athlete. My goal was to embark on a general business career or athletics. But injuries through sports stopped a sports path, so I decided upon business with a focus in marketing. While attending undergraduate school at University of Wisconsin-Parkside, I began to write screenplays in my senior year. At first it was for fun, but I quickly learned writing allow me to transfer negative energy into characters I created. This led to a decrease in depressing mood swings, which in turn boosted my quality of life. After undergraduate school in May of 2011, I move to New York City for graduate school. While pursuing my MBA, I continued to write screenplays, but always wanted to write novels as well. I finished graduate school back in the year 2014, but wrote screenplays until I began thinking of my first short film, first First Day Fears. While finishing my fifth feature length screenplay, I started to write my first novel this year. So far, I have finished my first short film and working on my next one (Freedomless Speech), and recently self published my first novel (The Boy Who Could Talk To God) and short stories book (Faheem Jackson Short Story Collection Volume 1). My feature length screenplays have been put on temporary hold to finish my short films and books, but I am making good progress on my sixth feature length screenplay. With year 2017 ending, I am currently writing my novel Precinct 86 and Faheem Jackson Short Story Collection Vol. 2. I have started teaching myself photography and will pursuing that by summer of 2018, along with my videography, podcast later on, and more research for my documentary.

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