DOUBTERS: WHY YOU ACTUALLY NEED THE HATERS IN YOUR LIFE

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“You will never make it, so why try?”


We’re always taught in our lives to surround ourselves with good people.  Place yourself around those going in the same direction as you. But what happens when all of that is attempted to be derailed by someone who wants to kill your dreams. That means you have to work that much harder to make it happen yourself. Those dream killers are the doubters who either out loud or silently told you it would never happen. They are the ones who it didn’t work for them, and don’t want it to work for you. Where does it come from; why do they need to feel the need to bring you down? And why do you actually in a way need these type of people in your life.

Doubters are people who for a number of reasons may not want to see you succeed in your career of interests. You have the first group of doubters that are the ones that will tell you try something else. They are flat out not interested in anything you do. They see you in the present state and can’t see past that point. You’re perceived by them as a slacker or loser. So they can’t get around the loser that is you. So to them you’re going to always be what your are. Another group of doubters are the people whose careers didn’t pan out so they have to tell you how much it won’t work for you. To them, they couldn’t make it and there is no way you’re better than them. So they just know you’ll fail in life. And if you do succeed, they’ll find the most negative stuff to say about you.

The third group of doubters are the people who have their success and don’t want you to surpass them. To them, you are a threat and must be stopped. But they are not going to just stop you, they’ll be overly negative. The goal is to get you to quit because a lot of times you work for them. They are comfortable with you under them and can’t stand you above where they think you should be. Kind of how comedians have come out recently after Kevin Hart. They were fine when he was below them, now he’s way above them, and now there is every reason to say he doesn’t deserve it. But the last group of doubters are the flat out hate group. They usually have no real discernible talent, and need to bring you down. Because your success further shows how much of their life was a waste. Especially if they remember when both of you were at the bottom. It shows how much time they’ve wasted in their lives.

Now, with all that I have stated, why do we need these doubters? Well, first and foremost they push us to be better. There is no motivation like people telling you you’re not good enough. You work overtime to prove them wrong. But I think the biggest reason we need doubters is to gain an insight into the human psyche. People who doubt you expose aspects of their personality. And not because of criticism; but hate. Criticizing someone is fine when you have a solution to make a situation better. But hate for the sake of hate let’s you in on who the criticizers are internally. And in the end that’s the just of doubters. They have their own internal workings going on. But how they see you and who you really are is totally different. As long as you have self-awareness, what they say has no hold.


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