DOUBTERS: WHY YOU ACTUALLY NEED THE HATERS IN YOUR LIFE

Image result for rejection

“You will never make it, so why try?”


We’re always taught in our lives to surround ourselves with good people.  Place yourself around those going in the same direction as you. But what happens when all of that is attempted to be derailed by someone who wants to kill your dreams. That means you have to work that much harder to make it happen yourself. Those dream killers are the doubters who either out loud or silently told you it would never happen. They are the ones who it didn’t work for them, and don’t want it to work for you. Where does it come from; why do they need to feel the need to bring you down? And why do you actually in a way need these type of people in your life.

Doubters are people who for a number of reasons may not want to see you succeed in your career of interests. You have the first group of doubters that are the ones that will tell you try something else. They are flat out not interested in anything you do. They see you in the present state and can’t see past that point. You’re perceived by them as a slacker or loser. So they can’t get around the loser that is you. So to them you’re going to always be what your are. Another group of doubters are the people whose careers didn’t pan out so they have to tell you how much it won’t work for you. To them, they couldn’t make it and there is no way you’re better than them. So they just know you’ll fail in life. And if you do succeed, they’ll find the most negative stuff to say about you.

The third group of doubters are the people who have their success and don’t want you to surpass them. To them, you are a threat and must be stopped. But they are not going to just stop you, they’ll be overly negative. The goal is to get you to quit because a lot of times you work for them. They are comfortable with you under them and can’t stand you above where they think you should be. Kind of how comedians have come out recently after Kevin Hart. They were fine when he was below them, now he’s way above them, and now there is every reason to say he doesn’t deserve it. But the last group of doubters are the flat out hate group. They usually have no real discernible talent, and need to bring you down. Because your success further shows how much of their life was a waste. Especially if they remember when both of you were at the bottom. It shows how much time they’ve wasted in their lives.

Now, with all that I have stated, why do we need these doubters? Well, first and foremost they push us to be better. There is no motivation like people telling you you’re not good enough. You work overtime to prove them wrong. But I think the biggest reason we need doubters is to gain an insight into the human psyche. People who doubt you expose aspects of their personality. And not because of criticism; but hate. Criticizing someone is fine when you have a solution to make a situation better. But hate for the sake of hate let’s you in on who the criticizers are internally. And in the end that’s the just of doubters. They have their own internal workings going on. But how they see you and who you really are is totally different. As long as you have self-awareness, what they say has no hold.


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2017: WHAT’S TO COME OF THIS NEW YEAR

2017 Calender on the red cubes

“What is your plans for the next 12 months?

We all look forward to the New Year. It gives us chance to reflect on the year. But more so, we make resolutions that we work to keep for the upcoming year. For me, I have quite a few plans for 2017. They include, film, theater, novels, podcast show, and photography. Now, you may think, will I be doing this all at once. The answer is no, of course not. But over the course of the year I am hoping to accomplish a variety of endeavors. My first being finishing my first novel and book of short stories.

I started my novel and short stories books in May of 2015. I am performing some line editing, then I’ll design my book covers for both books. This is a crowd builder, which will aid in my next novel and short story book. Setting a goal for myself to write a novel each year and book of short stories together is going to be tough. But continuously contributing to my blog post keeps me engaged in writing my novel and short stories. Making myself write something, anything is beneficial to my books. Well, what about my other projects I have in the works. Such as my next short film I’m looking to shoot in the spring/summer of 2017.

My first short film was ok, but this one has an ability to be greater. I know more about the process and preparation has already started. The film is a 15 minute short about a public figure and her difficulty with being honest in a world where outright honesty could hurt her career. I wrote this screenplay back in September and I have been preproduction planning since then. Hopefully, this will bring me one step closer to making my first feature film. Which is why I also have taken an interest in photography. Working with stills I feel could improve more of my visuals in regards to film.

A more personal goal is health. Towards the end of the year, winter has brought sicknesses; yep, flu season. My internal resolution is to keep the mind as well as the body healthy. To eating healthy and living healthy. Which brings me to another project, my podcast show. I thought about making the show pertaining to societal issues. But that can be depressing, so I want it to comprise of motivation and inspiration.

In the end, a lot of people make resolutions, but few stick to them. Resolutions are a commitment. And they are commitments at times which requires you to work outside of your normal day job. But it is possible. You are a decision maker in your own future. Make plans and stick to them. Unless an emergency arises, they shall not be broken.