THE KNOW: HOW UNDERSTANDING YOUR PATH TO SUCCESS COULD BE LEARNED

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“I made because I have the it factor.”


cognition

We all have a way in which we process information in our minds, But is there are more to putting yourself in the know, and educating your way to success? Because no matter how much you give people knowledge, they have to be able to harness the information and make it work for them. And the making it work for the is where life becomes complicated. Because there is no road map to figure out how to be successful.

the learning environment

Now, when you are in school and trying to navigate through this academic space, how do you maintain good grades. Well, you have to train yourself to remember the lesson plan. But it’s not enough to remember, how do you use it is what’s important. How do you harness what you learned to build a life for yourself? That is something only you can figure out.

where does learning come from

Why are some people able to learn with ease and others struggle? Who is selected through what process to attain the knowledge needed for growth in their lives. And that is by way of natural selection process. Reality is that there is no real means of knowing who possesses what abilities. Not until they step into society. It may be a trait, or it may be based out of need and your own personal growth.


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EXCEEDING EXPECTATIONS: HOW YOU CAN BE HATED FOR BEING MORE THAN YOU “SHOULD BE”

Image result for EXPECTATIONS

“Who are you to be where you are!”


Filmmaker and actor Tyler Perry gave a speech before a group of college graduates where he stated exceeding past the expectations of where people feel you should be is when you create enemies. Because now you start to get individuals saying how dare you think you’re more than what I think of you. It’s from this internal emotion built in where we just know how your life will turn out. We just know that you can’t be more than what we see you as in society. And when you do succeed, the people who never thought you would be where you’re at have to do some serious self-reflecting. They’re Image result for self reflectforced to come to terms with two things in life. One they aren’t good characters of judgement. And number two, they are now forced to sit back and look over their lives thus far. They must now look at themselves in the mirror and say, “If only you had taken your life more serious, where would you be by now.”

So now, you as the successful person becomes the scorn of another person. Because they look at you and say, “You made me see myself.” Why, well no one really likes to look into a mirror and reflect. We often turn away, and look somewhere else. But this person you thought wouldn’t succeed makes you reflect; so much so, it stays on your mind. Especially if the success story had a troubled past. When the past of a person is ground level, and they work their way from that point, there is also an inner hate and disdain carried toward that person. You see, a successful person with a troubled Image result for accountabilitypast can be dismissed if we don’t know or having ever met the person. But when that person was someone we saw throughout life, sour grapes fills our mouths. What’s sad is that so many people can still rebound in life, yet they’re so angry at you, they miss their own blessings.

Is there more, well yes there is more to discuss. What happens when the success is doing something that the person angry don’t like, and can’t figure out why you’re successful. Well, the success has people that love what they do. And if it’s not something you like, find something that you like and stick to it. But people hate to not like something and what they don’t like go on deaf ears. No matter how ridiculous the claim, the claim still exist. That’s why social media tends to be so dangerous because there is this mob mentality; a community of people who wouldn’t otherwise have a Image result for mob mentalityvoice, able to negatively effect lives of others. In the end, when you take off, and become successful, you will have people not like you. But when you reach an altitude that many feel you shouldn’t have reached, then you get hate. But it comes with the territory; you can’t be a loser out of fear of people not liking you.


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PEER PRESSURE: WHY SO MANY YOUNG PEOPLE DON’T FIGHT IT

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“A time in life without a sense of self.”


When you’re growing up in school, you seek to fit into the environment of that academic space. And coincidentally enough, that space is not attaining the best grades, but more so trying to wear the latest fashion, and hang out with what is perceived to be the cool kids. And that word perception sticks out the most because your perception of each other is what’s the strongest, not the real person. Why is perception the most important, well it has to do with lack of facts. The facts that lead you into the inner workings of the real person. But who cares about facts, when you can easily makeup a perception that suits you just fine. And that is what we live by all growing up until we become adults and take on our own identities. That keeping your image together for what people think you is known as your reputation.

Now, considering your reputation proceeds you wherever you go, you work hard to keep that image in tack. But what if your image is not the image of what your peers think is acceptable for you to have in life. See, it’s easy as an adult to say, screw that, this is such a small window into the outside world, but kids don’t understand your advice. We can look at life from such a rational perspective, once you step out into the world. You have realized as an adult that no one truly cares how much swagger you have in life. You have to be able to be productive, but that built in understanding is not present in kids and teens. You can’t fully expect children to have that level of self-awareness, or that built in rejection mechanism that you get once you become adults. To them, this is your circle of friends for life. As adults we understand you may never see these individuals ever again once you graduate high school.

And not because you think you’re better than your friends, but more so, you start to out grow people’s mind frames. So the kids who were once your adversaries, eventually become people you have as associates. Now, there are those exceptions to the rule; such as the kids you just walk to the beat of their own drum. These kids are very few and far between, but they do exist. I took on the walk to my own beat after getting injured in sports. You go from, “Who is that boy that runs track and plays football so well,” to “He use to fly playing sports, oh well.” That’s when I learned people like you for what you’re doing, not necessarily because of you. So they generally gravitate toward that because we all want to be attached to something we perceive to be great, even if it’s for a short stint. Yet again, there goes that word perception; people perceived me to be great.

And in the end, that’s why fighting peer pressure is so difficult for so many young people. It’s not just the idea of wanting to not be the odd one out, but you want to be attached to something you perceive to be better than yourself. We all have this time in our lives where we want to be something other than ourselves. And once we see someone who appears to be doing anything remotely better than us, it looks appealing to us. So if the kid who has the latest sneakers growing up walks into school, we seek to be close and attach ourselves to that person. That person could potentially have a trouble home life, but they are perceived to be better because they are in a social class outside of where we see ourselves.


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MY SINGLE LIFE: UNDERSTANDING SELF IS KEY TO LIFE’S FULFILLMENT


Man Wearing Grey Shirt Standing on Elevated Surface

“Certain things never change.”


I have posted previous topics regarding being single and self-awareness. Only this topic aims at why I am the type of person who prefers to be single over being in a relationship. And it has a lot to do with aging and coming to an understanding that you feel a certain way and it may never change. Now don’t get me wrong, we as humans go through many transformations throughout our lives, but there are personality traits which will never change about you. And for me, being the aloof person who don’t quite want you around is a personality trait of mine that I feel is for the rest of my life. It’s something that I love most about myself, but there are the downsides of being as aloof as I am. The downside is that you can more than likely guarantee you’ll never find a successful relationship. And for most, they are able to stomach that reality.

And what do I mean by being as aloof as myself. Well, there is this amazing aspect that I found about life in coming home and not having to compromise with anybody for anything. Going to the refrigerator not having at ask what to eat or being on a schedule. That feeling when you walk in the house at 7:00 p.m. or 12:00 a.m., and it not being a discussion is paramount. I shouldn’t have to explain where I’ve been, I just want to sleep. And that’s when it sinks in, “Buddy, you need to be single.” You think to yourself, “Really.” Well, yes, you should remain single if you are the type of person that I am in life. The problem is, is that most people don’t stay single. They want someone to accept their personality, but that’s just not realistic. Because a relationship is about compromise, not doing things you genuinely want to do. That’s when I get that not interested feeling in my stomach.

At first, it is something that is depressing, but you know your mind better than anyone. You know deep down inside why, but it hurts. But for me, at age 30 years old, I say to myself, “Oh, ok, this is what this is.” The “oh” is coming to realization that you mean I have to do what to date or be in a relationship. That is why I never have been in one. I have to speak to your friends, or get to know your family members. What the hell for, can’t I just be with you, and not have to be in their presence. Then you pause and say, “Yeah, maybe being me is a risk.” Because in the end, you have to have a non-negotiable list. The things you will deal with and not deal with in life. And my list is I should not have to speak to friends or family I don’t want to talk to or may not like; I should not have to do relationship people things like be around other couples; and I should not have to consult with you before doing anything. And those top three will keep you single. But I love the me that I am. And coming through adulthood I have become happier and more aware; and that’s what’s important.


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RUNNING ON EMPTY: TRYING TO DO TOO MUCH AT ONCE

burnout, close-up, composition

“Take it easy people.”


Have you ever had the feeling like you’re operating on fumes. And what do I mean by fumes. I mean people who spend their days running from one place to another; whether it’s running errands for the house or tending to your children. For me, I am pursuing a career as an artist, so I am all over the map. But let me break down the type of artist. I came to New York City pursuing a career in screenwriting/filmmaking in the year 2011. And since then, I have written two books, made two short films, and wrote nearly ten screenplays as a practice to get better as a writer. Oh, and let’s not forget the two blogs I started on WordPress and Medium, with photography and podcasting coming in the year 2018. So as you can see, I am all over the map. But there is more structure to my work than you might expect.

But with the structure comes the feeling of running on empty. That feeling you get when trying to accomplish too much at once. So, you have to sit back and assess situations; come to the conclusion on what needs to be done first. Prioritizing is very important when trying to figure out your task at hand. Knowing what you should be working on, and what will aid you in getting to where you have to go faster and more efficient. Like I said before, you might think I am doing a lot, but I am a very productive person. But for those that are less productive, they could use a little assistance in the areas where I am typically strong. Here are a few pointers for working smarter so you have less stress and more energy.

THE MARATHON METHOD

competition, exercise, group

When I am working, I utilize my time like someone running a marathon. You don’t run a marathon all out because that is virtually, if at all possible. You must race to stay with the pack, at times putting a little burst of speed to keep the other runners on their toes. But also you’re putting yourself into position as well, not to mention anticipating the strength of the other people around you. And that is how I work; make sure to put enough into your work, then slow down a little bit. Give yourself time to assess the work you have done thus far. And if it’s going to be a long day, I typically go hard early, then coast a little bit; opening up my stride throughout the afternoon. And if I am working through the evening, then I reignite like earlier in the day. People wonder where my energy comes from, it’s because I know how to work smarter not faster. But I also have learned over the years the limitations of my body.

PLAN AHEAD

agenda, concept, development

Have a plan for what you’re going to be working on the day of. This might be the night before, days, or even weeks earlier. For me, I like to walk great distances to the computer lab at my former graduate school where I contribute to my blog and write my screenplays. This way, it gives me time to think about a particular topic for when I sit down and start. Now what’s interesting about me, is that I don’t think about a topic to write. Thinking about a topic to write, makes writing harder for me. When I want to plan my day for writing, I think about something totally unrelated to writing, so once I sit down to write, I have a topic to write about.

KNOWING YOU MEANS A MORE SUCCESSFUL YOU

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A big, big understanding you must have of yourself is a strong sense of self awareness. Know what your mind and body can take as you work. I am someone who can work all day everyday, and rarely get tired. But that is me, you might work a different way. Now notice I said work all day everyday, but I didn’t say on what I was working on. My day consist of me working on a few chosen projects, maybe even one if I feel I can be more productive with the one. I never try to put too much on my plate at one time. All that does is cause unnecessary stress and tension that you don’t have to have in your life. So only carry a load in which you know you can hold.

POSSIBILITIES: In the end, knowing how to manage your time and stress levels can lead to a more prosperous and satisfying life. Too often, we try to cram everything in at once because we have this tomorrow is not promised to us mentality. And to an extent, we are not promised tomorrow, but on average, we are given another day. So when you try to cram so much in, in one day, you inevitably drain yourself for the next day. You become less productive and less efficient, thus feeling as if you’re running on empty.


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VULNERABILITY: HOW IT’S HARD FOR US TO BE HONEST WITH US ABOUT OURSELVES

Low Section of Man Against Sky

“I can, can you you say the same?”


When I first started writing, it was back in 2011 at an attempt to write my first screenplay. But since then I have realized something with my writing. It has made me realize how transparent I have become because of what I write. In order to be good as a literary, you have to be as honest as possible, and why not start with yourself. I have come to terms with what is screwed-up about myself, and I am bent on changing that thing or things. Not only have I come to terms, but I am also in a mental space where I can talk about those issues and share them with the world. So my question to you all is, how come people have a hard time putting themselves out for others to see the real them. Where does that internal feeling come from that make us go into a shell when put in stressful situations.

One of the main reasons we hide is because of shame. We might have something in our personal lives that is far from the norm of society, but we can’t talk about it. So we hold it inside hoping that no one is able to see that internal thing that is us. And when put into positions where we are forced to explain ourselves, it becomes even more difficult to converse. These socially awkward moments are because man constructed society to give us even today a template for what’s socially acceptable. And anyone that deviants from that norm is seen as having a problem. I have things that I like that deviant from the norm, but unlike those who hide from it, I am able to converse about the things I like. But besides the shame, what are other reasons that people can’t be open with who they are in society.

Another reason is that we want to stand out front and be unique, but then when put in a real unique situation we run. It’s because what makes us unique that is hidden deep within us is not a unique quality that others can grasp and understand. Meaning, your unique quality might be mathematics, but how you become so good at it is because you see the numbers in front of you. Sometimes to the point that the numbers seem to float in the air. It sounds like you’re in serious need of a psychiatrist, but it’s real. Some people’s minds are made up a certain way that discerns information a hell of a lot different than the rest of us. They can understand and wrap their minds around problems in the strangest ways that the rest of us cannot. And ultimately, what will you learn by opening yourself up.

In the end, it’s like Marianne Williamson’s famous Our Deepest Fear passage from her best selling novel, A Return to Love. “When we let our own light shine, we subconsciously give others permission to do the same.” “When we are liberated from our fears, we automatically liberate others.” Don’t worry about the immediate nay sayers because it’s about the bigger picture. You’ll open yourself and masses who feel the same as you, or make people want to do what you do the more you open up. And that’s when you make the immediate connection of bringing people close who see you as a guide to a more prosperous life that they should be living.


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YOUR VISION NOT ANYONE ELSE’S: WHY THEY DON’T BELIEVE IN YOU

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“Don’t expect them to believe in you.”


Someone I work with today was informing me that they have had enough and it was time to pursue their purpose. They were about the quite work and embark on their journey to their own personal greatness. It struck me as odd because this was a person who worked a lot, but now they were quitting. But I am embarking on my own journey, and I don’t know what road it will take me down. And that’s when it hit me, I don’t know this person’s inner workings. Maybe they feel that they have it figured out and things are finally making sense inside of their heads. The pieces are starting to come together and everything is working out for the best. But what is it about the people who don’t see your vision? They can not see you past what you are in the moment, and it takes them longer. Sometimes they never turn around, and only live to see you falter.

The reason being is that they may now have passions of their own, or they might not want to see you above them. If you are working a dead-end job and someone is above you, why would they want to see you prevail in life. They might hate their job just as much as you hate yours, but at least they have the upper hand over you. What happens when you overshoot the runaway of what they expected. Your airplane was never supposed to have made it out of the gate. But you have managed to fly off the runway and into the sky. So much so that you are cruising at altitude while they are still at the terminal watching you soar in the air. And that is when it sinks into their head that they must try to say something, anything to get you to stop working.

Because if they give you the confidence to keep pushing, then what is there out here for them. And that’s when you learn that there are people who look at life in the scope of their failures is your success. If you doing so much and they are not where you are, then what does that say about them. So they have to bring you down a few pegs. But if your life is in so much of a wrecked place, do something about it. Don’t try to bring someone else down because you have not landed on your feet. You are not where you thought you would be by now, so in an attempt to not feel alone, you want to keep them where you are in life. This also falls into the whole crabs in a barrel mentality. You are fine by me, so long as we all are stuck in this one place together. And that’s when you have to make moves to separate yourself.

Because in the end, your personal growth is your growth. It’s not up to you to help another adult figure out their stuff in life. You are responsible for your own problems. So as you pursue your dreams, don’t listen to the crowd noise. Your main goal should be to try to tape into the minds of those that love and respect your vision. You are going to always have adversaries, that’s the nature of the game. Just as long as you meet your expectations, that’s all that truly matters.


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