“Why sometimes our equal could be a turnoff.”
Men are protectors, we are providers, especially when it comes to the women in our lives. But what happens when that woman is not only a provider, but she is just as bossed-up as you? We always say in public how we love ourselves a single independent woman, but to a large degree, we love to have women that need us. And when I say need us, I don’t mean needy. There is a difference between need and needy. The needy is more clingy and can’t leave your side which tends to be quite irritating. But the need would be something as little as changing a tire or paying for a meal at a restaurant. Because we are raised from a young age these are the things you are supposed to do for the women in your life.
Yet in today’s society, women are in more privileged positions than they were in the past. Yet unlike the past, they are having a harder time finding love. Why, is it because the access to quality men has lessoned? No, it’s because there are so many men who feel, “Oh, she has everything together already, she doesn’t need someone like me.” “A man like me would be more suitable for a women who could use the help.” Meaning, a woman who is a teacher would need the guy more than the woman who is a boss like an Oprah Winfrey. We look at Oprah and say, “Why would you need a guy, you have everything under control already.”
And that is what causes the disconnect. Because we as men look at finances as this end all. When a woman is of financial means, we look at her as being both man and woman. She is a man because she is bossed-up, but a woman because of the obvious. So I don’t think guys are intimidated by her success. So many of us look at her like, she has the situation herself, we need to be with the woman who could use the help. What help do you need if you are already in the position that we seek to fill. Now women on the other hand don’t see the situation as such. To them, they could use someone in their lives just as much as the woman not on her level.
To her, if she is a boss, it gives her more reason to need the relationship. The relationship serves as the stable environment outside the hectic world of her business career. To her, you can’t put a price on relationships, yet on the other hand it’s what we are as men. Because in the end, we are raised to be productive as men. Money is not everything, but a financial contribution is a major reason why men introduce ourselves into the lives of women. Being a financial provider is a major aspect of how we define manhood. Making money means, the mortgage, rent, utilities, food, transportation, clothes, healthcare, travel/leisure, education, and care for kids. It’s an entirety that makes us want to be men of financial means. So when women already have it, we feel her life is already filled.
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