ME TOO. TIMES UP: HOW WILL THE MOVEMENT PAN OUT OVER TIME

art, awareness, campaign

“Stand up, speak out.”


me too/times up

Over the past year, there has been a downfall of Hollywood’s elite men. There have been a wave of women coming out over the past indiscretions of studio executives and actors. Women who have been victims of sexual harassment and assault.  And with the downfalls came the movements we now know as Me Too and Times Up.

So with that said, how long will these two movements continue? And will they both take a turn for the better or for the worse? Because with what happened to comedian Aziz Ansari, the movement could have been in jeopardy.

upsides

Now, will you stop all of sexual harassment in society; the answer is no. That is a physical impossibility. But a lot of the movement’s cause has to do with harassment in the workplace. And that is the decline of harassment so women can work in a safe space without having to deal with constant advances. And for that, there have been progress.

Sexual Assualt stats by the EEOC

It’s not a fool proof movement, you’re going to always problems. But the goal is to deter the situation. And from the looks of things, we are seeing progress. But, is there another side to all this push back.

downsides

As with the positives of the movement, there are the downsides. And one of them we have already seen. That is when comedian Aziz Ansari was accused of sexual assault, and what it amounted to was a bad date. And this is what the movements have to speak out against. If not, you’re going to start to notice women coming forward for anything just to get their names out there.

And with it goes the movement that was meant to protect women. When we live in a society without due process, you start to get into trouble with false claims. But the moment you say due process, you’re automatically calling the victim a liar. When in reality, you might be saving yourself in the event that the perp is not the real per at all.


My Personal Website: www.faheemjackson.squarespace.com

Instagram Me: @theefaheemjackson

Twitter Me: @2320howe

Medium.com/@faheemjackson

Tumblr Me: @fjackson44

GENDER SWAP: HOW THE EXPECTATIONS OF MEN AND WOMEN CHANGES

Image result for GENDER

“SHe-IM.”


expectations

As a man in society, I have always known from a young age that there are these expectations from us that are typically different than women. Funny because I was raised in a house with a mother and two sisters. You would think I was inundated with all these feminist viewpoints that I carry with me still today. Yes, there are ways I see the world that may be through the lens of a women via the women that raised me. But at the same time, they gave an honest feel for how the world actually works, not an illusion or from their own internalized disdain.

what is gender

When we observe what is gender, we have the definition which states that gender is the cultural and social differences that make up both males and females rather than the biological. Because the terms male and female are the biological words for the organism which either produces sperm or ovulates in the creation of an organism. Which means a women (gender) who is born female (sex) is so mutually inclusive because of the classification we give to the sex of a person. She is born female therefore she is a woman. And the same applies to a man. So in terms of the class and the biology, we are able to understand. But is everything so technical, or is there just an obvious aspect of all of this I have explained?

“outlined” expectations “old and new”

The following at the bottom are the two genders and the two sexes, as well as their expectations and limits.

MALE

Related image

  • Gender: Open doors for the woman on dates, protect and provide, being the voice for the son to lean on, sexual opposite, spiritual opposite, vocal
  • Sex: provide sperm, physically defined (shoulders, chest, arms, etc.), genitalia (penis), Y-chromosome
  • New Roles: Minimal house work, voice to both son and daughter equally, co-provider, limited protection, not always sexual opposite
  • New Limits: No new real change

FEMALE

Related image

  • Gender: Care for children, stay at home, voice to the daughter, sexual opposite, docile, primp, silent
  • Sex: X-chromosome, eggs, physically defined (breast, hips, rear), genitalia (vagina)
  • New Roles: not always sexual opposite, working woman, voice to both son and daughter equally, co-provider, self-protection, independence
  • New Limits: No new real change, except some physical attributes (strength)

workable or not?

Now, will it work in the end; men and women swapping in society? Can the woman be the man and man be the woman? I think there are certain aspects of who we are that will, and others can’t change. The ones that can’t change are so deeply rooted in who we are that change is impossible. Evolution has made us into who we are that yes, we will try to manipulate the limitations of ourselves, yet it will prove to not work. But there will still be considerable changes in expectations.


My Personal Website: www.faheemjackson.squarespace.com

Instagram Me: @theefaheemjackson

Twitter Me: @2320howe

Medium.com/@faheemjackson

Tumblr Me: @fjackson44

Facebook Fan Page: www.facebook.com

RAPE CULTURE: IS THIS A REAL ISSUE?

Related image

“No still means yes, really?”


against her will

For eons, women have had to bare the grunt of being subjugated to sexual assault. Whether it’s on a job or even in their home lives; women have been targets for many sexual attacks. But what my question would be is if there is a real culture based around the idea that rape is alright to a certain extent. Because as men, we have an idea for what rape would be in our mind, but in a woman’s mind it could mean something different. Because to a woman, even if she thinks rape it can constitute as rape; which is a slippery slope when you’re a guy. But I am not even fully referring to that, I’m talking about a different type of culture in the mind of a woman.

playful assault

To a woman, when you’re being playful, she might be a little uncomfortable. You might be thinking, “Oh this is just fine, she’s just overreacting.” For example, walking up behind a female and giving her a hug when you are not in a relationship or close friends. That could be seen as uncomfortable and that woman could go into a space. She could go to a place in her mind that makes her feel violated. Now, if she is into you, then she may let it slide. That can be a tricky situation that you have to feel out, but can also put you in a position to make her feel uncomfortable as well. That’s why when you’re on a job, you have to be sure that you are not coming off as someone putting a woman in a weird situation. So when in doubt, be professional.

what is rape really?

Men in Hollywood over the past year have been losing their careers because of their sexual assault allegations from their female counterparts. Some cases have been force and others have been methods of coercion. But to a man, rape is holding a woman down against her will, and raping her. It is the way we have been taught rape is in our lives. No, no; rape if not sexual assault is trying to get a woman to sleep with you as a coworker where you’re above her in a position of power. She might sleep with you out of fear of losing her job, which can lead to you being in a situation. Sexual assaults can also be seen as a guy at a bar who won’t stop trying to get your phone number.

signs

So what are the signs if you’re a guy of rape from a woman. It used to be force, or of course underage sexual contact. But now in today’s society, the lines seem to be blurred. And when you look in in the history of society, we have cultivated this environment that have made it difficult for women to exist without having to watch her back. And biologically, women are less physically built than men, so they are already in a vulnerable position. But the only way this can be dealt with is through progress.


My Personal Website: www.faheemjackson.squarespace.com

Instagram Me: @theefaheemjackson

Twitter Me: @2320howe

Medium.com/@faheemjackson

Tumblr Me: @fjackson44

Facebook Fan Page: www.facebook.com

GIVE HER A PUSH: WHY AREN’T WOMEN ENCOURAGED AS MUCH AS MEN

Image result for SANDBERG

“They need a push just as much as we do.”


us and them

In the United States, as with worldwide, men are encouraged in a different way than women. We are pushed out into the world sooner than women, and expected to take lead more than women. While women at young ages are told to stand on the sidelines and let men do the leading. The above photo is of COO of Facebook Sheryl Sandberg who wrote a book about this very topic. How women are not as encouraged as men, and why it’s harder for women to get raises on jobs like men. But is there just a social aspect to leading or is there a more biological reason why?

social reasons

When little girls are growing up, they are not encouraged to do as boys do. And I am not referring to going to school. I mean putting yourself in positions that get you hurt emotionally and at times physically. Then need to love ones self is not as strongly pushed so girls compare themselves to other girls in school and in the public eye. But we also never give girls the suck it up speech. When boys are young we’re told, “Shut up and suck it up,” “Deal with it.” You know as a guy early on that failure is apart of life because it’s been pumped into your head at such a young age. So when failure happens we charge it to the game. But girls, we cuddle them too much; treating them like they’re too delicate to handle hurt early on. Then women are tossed into the thralls of the world where people could care less and you get hurt. Now, taking lumps becomes new and a lot more difficult.

nature

On the other hand, we not only have the social reasons as to why women are not pushed like men, but the natural reasons. Nature plays a role because when a women is more likely to want to share a position than hold the top spot. Not just in work places, but also in monogamous relationships. Men not only want the top spot, but we are completely content with the idea that there are people underneath us. Especially in cases of dating where we want to be the one in control. Yet it’s harder for women to respect and love a man where she takes the lead all the time. But for guys, we like the lead.

progression in time

Women have taken on roles more and more over the years. But still, we don’t encourage girls as much as boys. So boys are more than ready to step into the world because we deal with the lumps at an early age. We don’t force girls to take their lumps at an early age. Girls are not forced to take loses, and suck it up and deal. But boys are taught that dealing is apart of manhood, so learn it now to prepare yourself for adulthood.


My Personal Website: www.faheemjackson.squarespace.com

Instagram Me: @theefaheemjackson

Twitter Me: @2320howe

Medium.com/@faheemjackson

Tumblr Me: @fjackson44

Facebook Fan Page: www.facebook.com

THE RELATIONSHIP TAGLINE: HOW WE AS MEN HAVE SHIFTED OUR LANGUAGE TO APPEASE WOMEN

Related image

“We say it, but do we feel it?”


“I want a woman with her own money, and dreams, and everything else she wants that society says I should want from a woman.” This is the tagline that every guy is supposed to say when asked what he wants from a woman in a relationship. But do you really mean every word that comes from your mouth, or are you just saying that to get in good with women? Because if you’re just trying to get on her good side, she’ll peep your game out sooner or later. Then she’ll hate you more for wasting her time than if you were just honest to begin with; so why. Why do we say we want all these things from a woman in society, yet when we get these things that we say we do, we run from women. It’s an act that woman define as a weakness in men, and it is if you’re looking at it from the standpoint of what we say we want from women.

Only problem is, is that in today’s society, we are carrying this tagline because it’s what women want to hear and necessarily what they should hear from us. I’m not saying that men want a woman who does nothing for herself in life, but it is not to the extent to which we speak in society. But when you don’t say who she is and what she’s doing is important to you, we’re attacked for not caring. So what we have done as guys, is that we lie to women, but not with our words. Women tend to be better communicators verbally then we are as men. So when birthdays and holidays come around, we do things for women because it means something to you. Not always because it means something to us; Valentines Day comes around, you as that woman get two dozen roses. Why, well because it means something to you. Women react to these actions, and sometimes get hurt in the process.

So why is it so hard for men besides the societal aspects to be up front and honest about what we really want from women. And the reason comes from watching women’s likes and dislikes, then behaving according to what they demand and not who we are as a person. Meaning, she wants monogamy, but you want to just date different women. Instead of you passing on the relationship, you play boyfriend, and you’re not boyfriend material. So when it’s time to go to the next level, you remove yourself from the equation, or make her break up with you so you can avoid the commitment. So what is that men want, simple, have your life. Real men are not intimidated with your success. Have your career, hang with friends, but here is where it gets sensitive: do what I say do at some point in time how I want it done and tend to my needs as well.

And that’s when the problems start, since women of today translate that into control. “Do what I say do!” “What do you mean by that!” That’s when the conversation falls flat, not because he really wants to control you. Men are typically not good verbal communicators, so instead of stating the context of what you mean, you further bury yourself by lacking verbal communication. Meaning, do what I say do, isn’t jump when I say jump. It simply means, you have times where your word is law, and I have mine. And this is a particular moment in time when my word should mean something. It’s not control, it’s a reciprocal relationship. And in the end, that’s who men are, but societal standards are such today where you have to lie and give women a tagline. But eventually, she’ll believe in the verbal content and behavior. Yet if you’re not that guy, she’ll hate you more for not being honest in the beginning.


https://faheemjackson.squarespace.com/ (PERSONAL WEBSITE)

https://www.facebook.com/fjacks063 (FAN PAGE)

https://www.Medium.com/@faheemjackson

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=sr_nr_n_0?fst=as%3Aoff&rh=n%3A283155%2Ck%3Afaheem+jackson&keywords=faheem+jackson&ie=UTF8&qid=1492966094&rnid=2941120011   

@theefaheemjackson Instagram

@2320howe Twitter

WORKPLACE MANNERS: HOW TO ACT TOWARD WOMEN WHILE AT WORK

Related image

“Mind your manners.”


Over the past couple of months, more and more women have come out against men in the public eye with sexual harassment claims. Once the top man in the entertainment industry was brought down, Harvey Weinstein, there has been a constant barrage of women sharing their stories. You would think some of the men would say they were innocent, but all have been admitting to the behavior. So with that said, what types of standards must be further implemented in the workplace to insure that women are safe. And the reason that I say women is because the odds of men coming out in this fashion against the women are rare. As a matter of fact, men coming forward with stories is so rare because the workplace etiquette from women have traditionally been respectable. So what is it with this behavior that have lead so many of these men down this path?

Image result for matt lauerBecause just yesterday, television news correspondent Matt Lauer was fired from NBC for his sexual misconduct at work. And the problem is that a lot of these men come from a time period where so much of this bad behavior was commonplace. As a matter of fact, it was so commonplace, that women never even thought twice about the advances at work. But today, with so much changing in this digital era where information travels faster, you can’t be what  you used to be at the workplace with behavior towards women. That is not to assume that the women in the past were totally fine with the advances because a lot of them weren’t. They just had a hard enough time trying to secure employment, so they didn’t want to say anything that would have rocked the boat. See, I have a different means of approaching the situation when working with women at work.

Any job that I have had, usually involves me having very small talk with the women around me. Keeping everything very basic and very simple; with a hello, how are you, and then conducting my business as usual. It may come off as distant and antisocial, but when you see what has been transpiring in the news to public figures, I know I would be fired. But that type of atmosphere in itself is rather uncomfortable, yet you have to watch yourself. Because I know women who don’t mind being complemented at work when they look nice, but others meet the comments with disdain. And you are basically rolling the dice when you speak.So what is the proper workplace etiquette?

In the end, most women will tell you that they don’t come to work to be complemented. But there are women that feel a lot more comfortable around some men and not others. So the answer is Image result for women workplace flirtynot always being complemented, but whose giving the complement. And that in itself is a slippery slope. But the reality is that if the woman is uncomfortable, I don’t care if one guy makes her feel one way and one guy makes her feel the other way. The one guy that is making her uncomfortable must stop, not the one she’s fine with conversing. Sounds irritating if you’re a guy, but some men creep women out more than others.


https://faheemjackson.squarespace.com/ (PERSONAL WEBSITE)

https://www.facebook.com/fjacks063 (FAN PAGE)

https://www.Medium.com/@faheemjackson

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=sr_nr_n_0?fst=as%3Aoff&rh=n%3A283155%2Ck%3Afaheem+jackson&keywords=faheem+jackson&ie=UTF8&qid=1492966094&rnid=2941120011   

@theefaheemjackson Instagram

@2320howe Twitter

STOLEN AMBITION: WHAT IF THE WOMEN OF THE PAST COULD HAVE HAD THE OPTIONS OF TODAY

Related image

“What little they had made way for a lot today.”


My mother was born in the year 1960, making her the last of the baby boom generation. This was the first generation where men were coming home from the war and suburbs were being built up all across the country. Mass marketing and advertising was introduced and the influence of entertainment was taking hold. Why was so much going on during this time period? Well, it was because this was an era of mass population growth in the United States. Jobs were in abundance and the men who came home from World War 2 were settling in and with their wives building large families. But there was something else that was prevalent during this time period. And that is the fight which was taken to the streets by women all across the country along with the civil rights movements. Women were expected to act a certain way at times outside the realm of their choice.

It makes you think that what if these women were born in today’s society. How much would they have been able to accomplish had they had that push that women have today? My mother recently showed me a photo of her when she was a teenager running track and field. A sport that I took part in myself at a young age. Only difference between me and her is that, not only am I a man, but the encouragement I received was different than her generations. Girls were told to “shut up” and “keep quiet” when expressing their goals and ambitions. Ambition was for the boys, and staying at home was for the girls. It makes you think; how many of those house wives back decades ago often dreamed when being at home all day. What were their dreams when they would be cleaning floors or preparing meals for the family.

These were thoughts I never got a chance to ask my grandmother or great grandmother that I could ask my mother. I would have loved to ask my great grandmother, before you married my great grandfather what did you dream about in life. Because women today don’t have all these goals and women in the past didn’t have them. It’s just that women were not expected to do anything in life. I was an adult when my grandmother died, I wish I could have asked her what were her goals as well. Just so I could get some clarity into what life was like living with all of this bundled up inside. Asking them what it was like to not be able to do what you wanted to do.

See, in the end, so many young women say there is still a lot of work to accomplish for the women of today. But in the past, they had it much worse, even with the good times. I guess that’s why I push so heavy at my goals because my mother never got her chance to shine like she wanted at a young age. So many women at that time had so much potential to be great, but greatness was not an option. And for the ones who stood out front despite the lack of encouragement, it gave way to so many today.


https://faheemjackson.squarespace.com/ (PERSONAL WEBSITE)

https://www.facebook.com/fjacks063 (FAN PAGE)

Medium.com/@faheemjackson

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=sr_nr_n_0?fst=as%3Aoff&rh=n%3A283155%2Ck%3Afaheem+jackson&keywords=faheem+jackson&ie=UTF8&qid=1492966094&rnid=2941120011   

@theefaheemjackson Instagram

@2320howe Twitter