“How do you fit in?”
Have you ever been on a job and got the feeling that everyone in the room has a script of some sort except for you? You’ve been through it, the boss tells a joke and the whole room ignites into laughter. That’s when you realize that nothing can possibly be that funny. But more so, not only is the boss not a funny guy, everyone has this script. How did everyone in the room know that it was time to laugh? How did everyone in the room know when you should stop? And how did everyone carry the same exact feel for funny. This is not a comedy show; people who attend stand up shows know that we are all here to see our favorite comedian so the laughter is normal. But your boss is not a professional stand-up, so why laugh?
To get ahead that’s why; you want to climb the ladder. Wait a minute, you mean to tell me that in order to climb the corporate ladder I have to laugh at my bosses stupid jokes. Or I can’t suggest an idea that could help a situation out of fear it may make the boss look incompetent. The culture in a place like that can make anyone not want to be there. Yet at a young age, children are encouraged to go work for an organization. Then once you learn the workplace dynamics, it makes you not want to be in the environment. That was my life; and for a brief moment, let me take you through my life.
As a middle school kid, I wanted to attend business school. I admired men who have been successful in business because of their out of work initiatives as well internal. But when I became an adult an realized what I would have to be to fit into that world, it made me realized it wasn’t worth it. I would much rather have a voice in my own space than to feel like I have to sacrifice my self respect and identity to have something. Now most people would say, “Who told you that?” No one told me that, you can feel it. When you’re allowed to see two men making a mistake, yet you only are able to chastise one of them, that’s why. When my days are spent trying to make you like me instead of connecting to people outside, when you want to control how I communicate with people, I am compromising far too much.
When I look at my life from age 12 to about 22 years of age, I feel sometimes like I threw it away. I grew up poor and didn’t realize the real environment so I had these unrealistic expectations working for an organization. Wanting a voice to express myself was the biggest career goal for me in life. Not having to filter every single word, while a guy at the top feels he can. Yet no man nor woman earns the right to have an opinion. Having an opinion is your choice, but working in certain environments people make you feel like it’s a privilege.
In the end, when you’re in an environment where you feel uncomfortable to the point you’re depressed being there, remove yourself. Don’t stay any longer because you’re not going to be happy. It’s crazy that since childhood we all have this idealistic way of looking at the world. Then we become adults and see it for what it really is. That’s not to say working for an organization is a bad thing. I just think that working for an organization is not for me. I would much rather have a career working independently making a little less money than to be in an organization working for more.