I WAS HERE NOW I’M THERE: HOW IMAGINING YOURSELF IN A BETTER PLACE CONTRIBUTES TO GROWTH

“Think of a place far away from here.”


Whenever I am working on a particular project and need some form of motivation, I always go to a safe space. A quiet space, and that is in my head, while walking the streets of New York City. Now that sounds funny that I would say a safe and quiet space walking the streets of New York City. But I often find solace when there is a nice day outside and I am moving boutique, clothes, clothing
about the streets. To keep myself motivated moving forward, some picture themselves on a luxury resort, while I picture myself walking through the various stores. Stores that are high end fashion boutiques or driving a luxury vehicle around the city.

What’s interesting is that I am not this person who even remotely like being seen with that type of attention. But I do find that thinking about having those things tends to be very motivating. It also keeps me working hard toward what I could potentially have one day. Now like I said, having the means to buy whatever I want, I most likely wouldn’t buy a lot of these  automatic, automobile, automotivegoods, but you would be surprised with what motivates you and how. Now that is something odd, how am I motivated to continue to grow by way of something I think of having yet don’t really want in the end. It’s because the images I conjure up in my mind are sometimes better than the real thing.

Owning a 10,000 square foot house and driving a fleet of luxury vehicles seem appealing to the eye and ear. And a lot of that comes from a place of not having so much, you are motivated to have a lot. Yet my real goal is philanthropy, but I never really have philanthropy motivating images to propel me forward. You know, it’s quite interesting the things that will get you going to succeed in life and how they get you going. Even when you have no interest in wanting them, it’s something that keeps you working toward it.


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INTERNAL ABYSS: HOW TO FACE THE HURT THAT IS YOU

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“Fighting the me inside of me.”


Ever feel like you’re having one of those days when you have the internal feeling of fighting something. You either know what it is or don’t know what it is. But whatever the case may be, it has you fixated on nothing good in the moment. It’s that feeling you get when nothing seems to be going right. The feeling you get when you are sluggish and unmotivated. When you’re beginning to contemplate why are you alive and what are you doing with your life. And that my friend is the sign of depression. You have the strong case of hurt, pain, anxiety, and stress. It is sometimes an onset of emotions, and other times it is prolonged. So where does it come from?

In my own life, I have battled depression. I have always wondered where it came from, and now that I am an adult I now know. And that depression that hit my world came from childhood and adulthood. From childhood, it had a lot to do with the idea that I was always afraid of everything. I wouldn’t even climb the tree like a lot of children when my cousins would be outside. My fears kept me from doing so much, that now I look back and wonder for what. What was my reason for being so scared of so much. One of the reasons is because guys in my community were going to jail and getting killed. So to keep from being a statistic, I thought it would be best to fear everything: jail, death, even life. My other reason for fear was not having a man in my life to teach me how weak it was to fear what I was fearing.

But that fear does not stop there in my life. It follows you into adulthood. My adult fear was becoming a parent when I know I don’t want children. Yet, I do want relationships. And if a woman want a child, oh well, yet now you have a kid here. So now she is making a decision involving my existence that I want no part of. So I have lived in isolation because of it. And that isolation tends to make one depressed. But since finding writing, it has made me cope with any internalized problems. So now that you know a little about myself, what about you? What makes you fight the internal thing that is you. I know that the flip side of me being so afraid, it has given me urgency and focus on important aspects of life as well because I am not as spontaneously crazy. So how do you fix the you inside of you?

You have to bring yourself to a place that will drive out the good in you. Meaning, find things you love that you are good at as well. And then work to be great at those things. Everything else will fall to the waist side. But if your mind is only in the frame of the hurt and pain, and you can’t get past that, you will always be depressed. And in the end, that always being in a state of depression is what’s the killer. Because looking over life you’ll be more hurt that you never made the initiative to do something about your life. And by that time it’s far too late.


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SO SO CONCERNED: WHY ARE PEOPLE SO VESTED IN OTHER PEOPLE’S LIVES

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“Worrying about you is your only full-time job.”


In today’s society, the use of social media has put everyone in everyone else’s business. But why, why have we become so interested in what other people are doing. Why have we become so enamored with how others are living their lives? Part of it has to do with the nothing going on in our own lives and other aspects of it has to do with loving to get others in trouble. And that’s an interesting account of us; the getting each other in trouble. Because no matter if it’s a public figure or the average Joe. We love to catch people doing something they shouldn’t be doing. Where is all this coming from?

Well, when looking at it from the context of nothing going on in your life, that’s key. When you have goals and aspirations of your own, it’s virtually impossible to concern yourself with others. But when nothing much is going on in your own life, you have nothing but time. Because in today’s society working a 40 hour work week has become 30 – 35 hours per week. So now we have more free time than prior years. So what are you doing with that time? Are you utilizing that time to pursue anything? If not, what is your purpose in life? Just waking up to exist to the next day and then the next day is not a way to live. But for the people who have nothing but time, this is how they live their lives.

Which leads into my next reason as to why people are so concerned. They see that someone else’s life is much more interesting than their own. Because if you’re constantly working on something, your life is appealing to those that aren’t doing much of anything. For example, I am working toward a career as a filmmaker, author, and blogger. People look at that and feel your life is quite interesting. To you, it is a struggle, but to them it’s something to talk about. No matter how positive or even negative, it’s something to discuss. But a lot of times today, it’s not positive feedback, but the negative. So much negativity is leant out to those who are in what people who perceive as a better position.

An example would be the Kardashian-Jenner sisters. So many people have so much to say about them. Yet their lives are progressing forward and the people who hate their lives don’t change at all. You’re concerning yourself with sisters whose lives are in a position far beyond yourself. You should be working at trying to remove yourself from your bad situation. But they for some reason cannot see past what someone else has in life. What’s interesting is that the same energy placed on worrying about others should be put into your own life. Because that same energy is what that person you’re worried about is putting into their work. But you can’t make the people who hate see that for themselves.

In the end, we have become a society of voyeurs. This voyeuristic behavior has cost people jobs and relationships. Now, I don’t see it slowing down, especially with the increase in social media usage. But eventually, so many people will be snooping that finding out something about another person will be irrelevant. Worrying about other people will always render the same outcome. And that outcome will be people wasting their lives concerned with others. But if your life is heading in the right direction, you have no time to concern yourself with what others are doing.


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Don’t Be Afraid, Just Leap

Standing on the edge of a cliff looking over into the distance, you observe the scenery. The waves ripple on the surface of the water in combination with the wind creating a cool breeze onto land. Down below waves collide with boulders projecting from the ground as well as in the water. Green moss and other plant life cluttered together, surrounding and growing on the boulders. Life from the sea emerges from the waters; some crawling onto land others popping their heads just enough to get a quick breathe of air before going back under. You take a deep breathe as you observe life around you, then you hear a noise from behind. You turn around to see someone running in your direction. You quickly move aside and the person leaps off the cliff. Your hands clasps together over your mouth and your eyes widen. The shock of what you have just leaves you concerned for their safety. You slowly creep toward the edge looking over, and you see them gliding safely with a parachute of their backs. You think to yourself, “Wow, how the hell did they do that?” “What would make them do something so crazy?” “But most of all, I wish I could do the same.” You know what I say, stop wishing and start living. Stop observing the scenery and get into the scenery. As you stand at the edge of the cliff, the base jumper gliding adds something that much more artistic to the backdrop.

These people are so inspiring; the jumpers. We think to ourselves I wish I could do that, I wish I had the courage to jump. But you can’t hope and wish, you have to just do it. See the fear comes from not succeeding and failing the first time you jump. We’re afraid of the bumps and bruises you’ll get when you jump. Let me tell you, the jumper got all those bumps and bruises at first as well. The problem is that we don’t see their bumps and bruises, we see the success of the jump. Sometimes we want to live vicariously through these people because they give us the opportunity to be dangerous without taking the risk ourselves. That’s fine and all, but we want to be more prosperous in life. And in order to prosper, you have to put yourself in position to make things happen; you have to create opportunity for yourself. This means putting yourself in harms way. And that’s when people have a hard time taking that leap of faith. No one wants to smash off the cliff, hit the rocks below, or risk drowning if falling into the water.

Well guess what, these are the risk that the jumper assessed and faced when jumping the first few times. Then, the more they jumped, the more successful they became. Something I hate to hear is, “I’m thinking about,” or “I’ve been meaning to.” Don’t think, do. You say, “Well I have to work a day job.” Fine, then work on your dream on your lunch breaks and in the evening when you get home. You say, “Ok, well I have children.” Fine, work on your goal during lunch break at work, then after your children have been put to sleep. You will be running off of limited sleep, but how bad do you want it. How bad do you want to parachute as well? “Well what about….” and that’s when I look you in the eyes and go, you really don’t want it do you? When you have so great you will do anything to protect it. When you are running on four to five hours of sleep and eating snacks on the go, that is when you will succeed. Don’t get me wrong, I understand your fears, most people can take fear, you don’t want to fall too low that you can’t get recover.

You know what, that is the worry of every successful person. Like I said before, putting yourself in harms way is what you have to do to succeed. Creating value for yourself can’t be done by hoping and wishing. You have to go out and jump; take that leap of faith. I gave you the encouragement to jump. Now, if you don’t mind, I have to go. Oh, you wondering where I’m going, I have a cliff to jump off of; bye.