OOPS, BIG MISTAKE: REALIZE YOU MADE A CAREER DECISION TOO LATE

Closeup Photo of Man in Black Suit Jacket

“I shouldn’t have.”


i flubbed up

Pursuing the career you have always wanted and then it happens. You settle into the job and realize something quite depressing. That after all these years of building, you have finally arrived and now you feel as if you have made a career move that wasn’t in your best interest. How do you restart because at this point a lot of people just plow through it. Even if it is something they truly don’t want to do in life, they just stick it out. But what happens when you want to stop doing the thing you thought you really loved? Hopefully you are doing something that is easier to walk away from that is not too professional.

not that easy

Changing your career is not that simple when you work a professional job like a doctor or an attorney. Yes it’s been done before, Actor Ken Jeong (dentist) and author John Grisham (attorney). But notice it takes a very long long time because taking on these roles are totally different because they are specialized positions. And leaving a specialized position for a role in another field especially when you are of a certain age is tough. Comedian Joy Behar was nearly 40 years of age when she started in comedy. You have to give it up to people like that because trying something new middle age is tough because you are so set in your ways.

where do you go from here

Now that you know you have made the wrong decision, where to next? See, it’s easy to say , well you know what, I want to be a painter. How do you transition from being a pharmacist to a painter full time? Oh, and my I add, making a living? This is where so many people give up on the dream because they just are so used to living their current lifestyle, they are not starting over from scratch. So how do you get started? Most people who make the transition keep their days jobs. They work during the day and do their task at night. This way, over time they build up enough credibility to transition over. Yet even then it’s tough, because even though you love your dream, we like being secure as well.


Personal Website: http://www.faheemjackson.squarespace.com

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YOUR DREAMS ARE YOUR DREAMS: UNDERSTANDING YOUR GOALS IN LIFE ARE ACHIEVED BY YOU

Gray Dream Freestanding Letters

“They’re yours and yours only.”


your dreams

We all close our eyes and see this place where we want to be. And in my previous post I discussed how we have to think in scope of reality in respect to our dreams. But we also have to acknowledge the fact that our dreams are our dreams. And that no one else has any interest in you achieving your dreams but you. For some reason people think someone is supposed to help them. And notice I said supposed to help. Help is voluntary, not obligatory.

open hands

My career pursuits are very difficult, but not once do I look at other people and assume they should be helping me. Trust and believe, if I do get aid, I’m gladly going to take it if the help is worth it. But at the same time, when you look at someone with hands open wide as if they should be doing something for you, you are setting yourself up to lose. Because parents jobs are to give you something in your hand when you reach out for it. But there also lies part of the problem. Parents will give and give, and now the child thinks that’s an aspect of life. Yet they have actually been set up inadvertently for failure.

i could care less

Me, the world; no one gives a shit about your dreams. Pardon my language, but fuck your hopes and dreams. And that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. But understand when something is just a dream, but also understand you are the builder. Mainly, realize it’s just a dream that isn’t coming true. That means being honest with yourself and acknowledging that you are not good at something. You can have dreams of being a runway model, but when you are a female standing 5’5″, sorry sweetie, it aint happening. When you’re a man and you want to be in the NBA, but you can barely dribble a ball and stand 5’8″, find a new dream. That’s why I say I don’t care about your dreams. Know when they are unrealistic and understand that it’s your life not anyone else’s.

make it work

This brings me back to a speech Denzel Washington gave to a group of theatre students on dreams and goals. He stated that, “True desire in the heart, for anything that is good, is God’s proof to you, set before hand that it’s already yours.” But then he said you have to now claim it. And that’s where people fall short, claiming it. The consistency of showing up daily with no reward, but small strides to success is tough for them. But the one who puts in the work over time ultimately reaps the benefit.


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YOUR VISION NOT ANYONE ELSE’S: WHY THEY DON’T BELIEVE IN YOU

company, concept, creative

“Don’t expect them to believe in you.”


Someone I work with today was informing me that they have had enough and it was time to pursue their purpose. They were about the quite work and embark on their journey to their own personal greatness. It struck me as odd because this was a person who worked a lot, but now they were quitting. But I am embarking on my own journey, and I don’t know what road it will take me down. And that’s when it hit me, I don’t know this person’s inner workings. Maybe they feel that they have it figured out and things are finally making sense inside of their heads. The pieces are starting to come together and everything is working out for the best. But what is it about the people who don’t see your vision? They can not see you past what you are in the moment, and it takes them longer. Sometimes they never turn around, and only live to see you falter.

The reason being is that they may now have passions of their own, or they might not want to see you above them. If you are working a dead-end job and someone is above you, why would they want to see you prevail in life. They might hate their job just as much as you hate yours, but at least they have the upper hand over you. What happens when you overshoot the runaway of what they expected. Your airplane was never supposed to have made it out of the gate. But you have managed to fly off the runway and into the sky. So much so that you are cruising at altitude while they are still at the terminal watching you soar in the air. And that is when it sinks into their head that they must try to say something, anything to get you to stop working.

Because if they give you the confidence to keep pushing, then what is there out here for them. And that’s when you learn that there are people who look at life in the scope of their failures is your success. If you doing so much and they are not where you are, then what does that say about them. So they have to bring you down a few pegs. But if your life is in so much of a wrecked place, do something about it. Don’t try to bring someone else down because you have not landed on your feet. You are not where you thought you would be by now, so in an attempt to not feel alone, you want to keep them where you are in life. This also falls into the whole crabs in a barrel mentality. You are fine by me, so long as we all are stuck in this one place together. And that’s when you have to make moves to separate yourself.

Because in the end, your personal growth is your growth. It’s not up to you to help another adult figure out their stuff in life. You are responsible for your own problems. So as you pursue your dreams, don’t listen to the crowd noise. Your main goal should be to try to tape into the minds of those that love and respect your vision. You are going to always have adversaries, that’s the nature of the game. Just as long as you meet your expectations, that’s all that truly matters.


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ARTS OF THE HUSTLE: THE GRIND OF MAKING A LIVING FROM YOUR CRAFT

Person in Pink T Shirt Holding Brown Electric Guitar Walking on Blacktop Road during Daytime

“You might be starving, but you’re working toward something greater?”


The life of an artist is rough, but if you have something great, you have to keep going strong. But it’s tough when there are so many people, especially those in your age range, who are doing much more than you at the moment. Even though that’s not saying much, it’s still more than what you’re doing. But you can’t compare what you are doing to what they are doing. Your grind, your climb, your road to success is a lot different than them. And you have to embrace the journey along the way. Yet along that journey, there are some things you need to keep in mind as you are climbing toward your goals as an artist. You should always keep your day job in lieu of your craft, be prepared to sacrifice, learn to listen to those worth listening to, embrace the rough periods, put in the time & ready yourself, and know when you’re getting better.

The first bit of advice I have regarding keeping your day job is practical. Don’t just up and quite your job because you are pursuing your craft. I myself work two part-time jobs that subsidize my living while I pursue screenwriting/filmmaking. I have worked jobs ranging from retail to administrative, ushering concerts to small theatre roles. You take on every gig you can take in order to make room for you to stay working at your craft. Which also ties into the next bit of advice. You should also be prepared to sacrifice a lot along your journey. You will have to sit by and watch your enjoying their youth and building intimate relationships. Meanwhile, you’re building slowly while they live. And to add to it, there is no guarantee you’ll succeed. So you just grind away in pain, all the while you neglect aspects of your youth just to push forward in something you love.

And with so much sacrifice that comes with building your dream, you will have the nay-sayers. These are the people who will tell you to give up and quite. They’ll tell you to go and find something better else to do rather than build your dream. They will project their fears onto you because they see you doing something that they can’t accomplish. So to them you must not know what you’re doing. Because why would they be doing what they’re doing. In a very passive way they’re telling you not only are you no good, but you couldn’t possibly be better than them. And on top of the people rooting against you, there are the rough periods that will come along with the climb. These are the times of rough mental and economic obstacles. And what do I really mean by these rough obstacles? Well here is what I mean.

When you’re going through all these rough periods in life, it makes you realize certain aspects about yourself. You first realize how easy it truly is to live alone. You are afraid of being alone, but once you realize the people in your corner versus those that aren’t, it makes the times when you are doing well worth cutting people off. You also learn that along the way, you can live with a lot less than you thought you could at first. For me, I grew up in a poor household, so I thought the only way for me to be well off was to be very rich. Then I realized the real amount of money I would minimally need to make to live. Then pursuing my dream became much easier to fight for in life. And the reason why I have not lost hope is because I have been able to live off the bare necessities, but I also put the time into my work.

And putting the time in is very important. People talk about their craft, yet they barely work at doing what they say they want to do. You have to put yourself in position to make things happen to you. Put yourself in harms way and see what transpires out of the work. Then when you do get your big break, you have prepared yourself to jump right in. Like the old formula of life, opportunity + preparation = successful outcomes. And all of what I have said prior must be coupled together with an understanding of knowing when you’re getting better. Reach out to people and get feedback on your work. And don’t just ask friends and family; ask people with no real attachment so you know how people really feel. Family and friends will always cosign, yet the people will be honest. And in the end, put your soul into whatever it is you do. Even with no guarantee of success; know that you can fail and fall flat on your face but you do it anyways.


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CRASH AND BURN: WHY SO MANY PEOPLE LOVE TO SEE THE TRAIN WRECK

Related image

“Why do they build you up just to see you fall down?”

Growing up, you come from nothing and work your ass off. Eventually you become a success. People flock to you because they know where you came from in life. Everyone loves a rags to riches story. It gives them hope of maybe not quite the financial success, but a better way of life than they have at the moment. But where does this veer off into a whole other path. What do I mean by that; I mean what makes people become irritated with you? It’s almost as if your continuous success begins to make people sick of you.

Well why; why do people want to see a train wreck even though they know how far you’ve come in life. Ok, to be honest, everything is in context. I don’t think everyone hates you because your continuous success means you have a pretty good base of people who patronize your work. I’m talking about the people who want to be around for the collapse. Celebrities have to deal with people like this on a national level, but the everyday Joe has to deal with the same thing as well. But how does the average Joe deal considering the people that hate on them are usually friends and family.

I have a few reasons as to why people love to see the train wreck once you’ve become successful. One of the reasons is that people want to still be able to connect to you. Once you’re successful and that’s it, you become someone they can’t relate to. Your screwing up and falling shows that slight bit of normal to that person who doesn’t like you. Without a fall, especially if you’re really successful, they grow to be resentful.

Which leads to my next reason as to why people love to see a fall. The other is the feeling that your success is confirmation that they have not done much in life. If you worked in your 20’s and they partied, but now you’re very financially by age 30 and they have just become serious, they’ll sometimes resent. They realize that if they could have those ten years back, it could be different. The more successful you become the more they resent. Eventually, if the person is someone close to you, you have no other choice but to lose that relationship.

In the end, I don’t care how much disdain you receive, never compromise. And when someone hates you because you’re successful, become more successful. Learn to get revenge by being great. Not to rub it in the faces of people who hate you. But show them they don’t have an effect. Because once you crack under the pressure, they’ll continue to forge ahead. But remember to also never lose sight of the people who love you for achieving your dreams. And note that if you’re still successful, you have more love than hate.