INTO THE UNKNOWN: WHAT OUR TRUE FEARS ARE ABOUT LIVING

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“What will tomorrow bring is always scary.”


Growing up as a child, we have all these different places we see ourselves in life. We see ourselves being the top person in our career field. We see ourselves happily married with children. We see ourselves living this all-around great life, that sometimes doesn’t quite pan out that way. We see ourselves in all these positions, yet when it comes time to actually step into society, we have a hard time coming to grips with the real world. In the real world, things don’t turn out how we always plan them. Sometimes life throws you a curve ball and how you deal with the adversity says a lot about who are you as a person. How will you respond if life doesn’t turn out how you thought it would turn out?

Life is not this straight path that leads to this pot of gold. You might go to school, get out, get a good job, and in a matter of months have no place of employment and no place to live. How do you deal with this when it comes your way? What do you do when face with no job and no means of survival? There is no playbook when dealing in life, this is something that happens on the fly. We have all these theories on how to deal until it happens. That’s when panic sets in, and you start to make decisions that could worsen your situation. And at that point you realize what true adulthood is all about. Your biggest fears are right in front of you. Life has eaten you up and spit you out.

It’s tough because you look at all those people around you who never work as hard as you, yet you are the one who manages to go through so much. And then you’ll find yourself asking questions as to why you have to deal with such adversity, yet the people who don’t work as hard get to coast through life. But that you don’t want, what you never want to do, is make your disdain at your situation make you angry at another person’s life. Number one, never make the assumption that their life is going well. And number two, your life could actually worsen from where it currently is because you are so focused on them. Yet it’s hard to do so when you’re going through so much.

See, in the end, that unknown that you’re entering that is life can be petrifying. Even when you are prepared to live your life, you still have fears about each and every day. You don’t know when the supervisor will come in and say, “We had to let you go.” You don’t know when a simple hospital visit could be a longer stay that reveals a terminal situation. Yet thinking about it daily will also drive you crazy. So you live, going to sleep waking up, not knowing what will come of each day. But it is also that unknown that strangely enough makes you feel alive. That makes us appreciate everyday, because after all, it could be your last: last in a relationship, last on a job, last in life.


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LIFE DEALT ME A BAD HAND OR DIDN’T IT: HOW PEOPLE USE EXCUSES AS TO WHY THEY’RE NOT SUCCESSFUL IN LIFE

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“I had this to do and that to do.”


All throughout life you hear people make statements regarding them getting the short end of the stick when trying to succeed in life. They’ll tell you all the reasons why things in life didn’t go their way. They had a rough childhood and didn’t have the support. Or even they might tell you how they had children at a young age and couldn’t pursue. They’ll tell you how much of your life was so much easier than their own. But they are telling you this in the moment. I have always wondered in the past tense, while living in real space and time, do people really have it hard as they say they do. Meaning, do people have the short end of the stick. Or do people make decisions in the moments, that define their entire existence on this Earth. Because there is a lot of that as well.

For example, someone will tell you at the age of 35 years old, that they can’t pursue because  they have a family to look after. They have 3 or 4 kids, and they have to be a parent. Then they’ll slip up and tell you the age of these kids. “Well, my oldest is 5 years old.” Then it hits you that they had an entire decade of life that they didn’t have children as a responsibility. Now, the person must come up with yet another excuse as to why. “Well, before I had kids I had to take care for my parent/s.” But when you start to press them on this, they begin to fall apart once again. And that’s when you realize you must end the conversation because this conversation is heading down the road of typical. The typical talking piece on not wanting to be held accountable for your actions. They want to hop and skip over every aspect of life that they have lived.

People make excuses because they have a hard time coming to terms with the idea that they have wasted so much time on doing nothing. They have laid back and enjoyed and indulged in the moment even to a point sometimes of overindulging. But instead of just saying I overindulged, they say all the things that never happened. So what it does is that the conversation becomes a waste of time itself. This person has a character flaw, and they’re trying to figure out ways around the truth which is accountability. I am able to be accountable because that’s how my mother raised my sisters and myself. And you want to tell people so bad to take responsibility for the fact that you are in this space and situation because of you. Yes, everyone has a story, but you can’t just use the story when you were also engaging in so many activities that contradicts your struggle at hand.

In the end, you will always have people who find it hard to admit they are where they are to an extent because of themselves. Yes, there are the case of people that have been given a bad hand. But there is always someone in your spot that made it out. Your story is not a unique situation to be in, in life. But putting in the time to get a better space mentally, physically, spiritually, and financially is what people don’t want to do. They don’t want to put in that time because they don’t want to deal with the idea of putting in their all and failing. Yet they’re putting their all into to nothing so far in life and it has gotten them nowhere. Why not try to put something in to see if formulates into something great?


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NOT QUITE THERE YET: ARE YOU NOT IN THE PLACE YOU WANT TO BE IN LIFE

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“The long arduous path that is success.”


Have you ever had the feeling like you’re not in the place you want to be in life? Like you should be or thought you would be a lot farther by this point? Well, I am about to turn thirty years of age and I am working toward a career as a writer. While working toward this career, I am working two part-time jobs. And that sounds fine when you are a twenty years old, but not when you are thirty. Because when you are thirty, you are supposed to be a certain place by this time. You should be on your way to finding your first starter home and thinking about children, not writing. But I am pursuing a career I love, rather than a job I have to go to everyday.

So here I sit, in this moment writing. And to cope with the long road to writing success, I try to observe those that started around my age. And you see they had their first success at about mid to late thirties. Now I gave myself a ten year time period to break in as a successful writer of screenplays, playwright, and novels; with a little lightweight film/theatre directing. Now that I have gotten myself out of the way, what are you pursuing that your life isn’t where you thought it would be? We have all these visions when we are children of the things we will do as adults. But when we become adults, everything is up in the air once you are in the world on your own.

And everything is really up in the air if you have no clue what you want to do with your life. You typically spend all your time working, then coming home and existing. So the days turn into weeks, then weeks to months, and months to years. And before you know it, life has past them by, and they have not attempted at anything in life. And that is the scary feeling people have of not quite being there yet. They even see people their age making life decisions, going in the right direction. Yet they are still not there themselves. So they find any reason to avoid people they know out of shame. Why, well because we always compare ourselves to people that are around our age.

But what happens once people younger than yourself start making moves in life beyond you. That’s when you really start to feel uncomfortable. Seeing a new younger generation making moves that you feel you have not made yet. And what’s crazy, that young age group will feel the same once they reach my age. See, in the end, we don’t want to live with the failures. But we also don’t want to live with the idea of people saying I told you so. Trying at something and constantly failing at it over and over again. But I remember reading a quote by Thomas Edison which stated, “Many of life’s failures didn’t realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” But the real question is, how do you know when you’re close?


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VICES: HOW THIS ACHILLES HILL CAN RUIN OUR LIVES

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“How does it affect your life?”


Everyone has a vice in life that may or may not keep them from performing their daily duties in life. These vices can be something as simple as snacking on unhealthy food throughout the day or more severe like drugs. Where these vices come from, who really knows, but they are there. A lot of the time we can talk through these problems, then there are the times we have vices that are flat out impossible to have conversations around. Well, why, why is it so hard to have a conversation about that thing that is keeping you from living a life of morality? And a lot of it has to do with the shame associated with the vice.

That’s right shame, the shame that comes with the vice is so hard to talk about. Well, why is that? It’s because we have so many taboos associated with certain things that we can’t have conversations around the vice. For instance, what if the vice is watching porn. Who wants to say they indulge in watching pornography. No one wants to admit it, but we all know the names of some famous porn stars. We all watch, yet we are afraid of how others may receive it. But it is that same group of people who watch themselves. It’s almost as if we are all waiting to be judge by ourselves. We’re worried others may say, “That is wrong or that is immoral.” Yet they do it on some level as well. How about other vices we have as people that make it difficult to talk about.

Another common vice in society is drug use. And when I say drug use, I am not only referring to the narcotics such as Crack Cocaine, Cocaine, Heroin, and Marijuana. I am also referring to the more used prescription medicine. This is in use more than the heavy narcotics, but why. The reasons can be broad as to why. Some do it because it eases any physical pain, some do it to suppress some hidden emotion. And the reason behind the heavy use of the prescription is because there is also less taboo associated with prescription than heavy narcotics. Popping a Vicodin or drinking Oxycontin, people automatically think you are ill and need the drug. It’s a lot better than openly snorting Cocaine or shooting Heroin.

Now, we know the vice and why so many people have them. But what is it about the vice that makes it detrimental? And the detriment of the vice is when it starts to effect your daily life. Now consuming over the counter medicine can be a tricky one, but using heavier street narcotics is a no go. Watching porn is not immoral unless you’re watching underage or it gets in the way of your daily progress. Even alcohol consumption is fine until you decide to get in a car after drinking or you start to develop an illness from the alcohol. You see, in the end, what I’m trying to say is it’s all in moderation. Like I said before, prescription medicine is tricky, but street narcotics is never good in moderation. Other activities are fine in moderation as well. It’s all about balance, but when you’re out of balance, and the vice takes over your life. Then you’re going to start to develop problems that could effect your productivity.


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SO UNFAIR, YET OH SO FAIR: WHAT DOES LIFE REALLY MEAN?

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“What is your meaning of it?”


Life is unfair! I finally got life figured out! Life sucks! These are the statements that people make when asked about life. So many say that you have to live your whole life to actually figure it out. But do you really need your entire life to figure out life. But let’s be clear about something regarding what really is life. Are you talking the living or talking just life in general? Because we use this interchangeably, but both have different meanings. The word life is existing, it’s what I am doing in this moment typing. Or it’s what you’re doing in the moment reading this topic. But the idea of living on this planet is a whole other ball game. So what is so tough about life on Earth?

Well, for starters, let’s observe what life is. As a life form, we are Carbon based that has taken just over one million years to fully evolve. We’re still evolving, but the change is something we can’t take notice to in the present state. Our life expectancy is 40 years of age, but due to scientific research we live to be 78 years of age.  So to say that life is not fair, just does not resonate with me. What is so unfair about the idea that humans only have a one in seven million chance of life anyways. And if you don’t know what I mean by one in seven million, only one sperm will fertilize an egg in seven million. With those odds, life is a great existence. Now, on the other hand life is hard and life is unfair.

But let’s observe what it means to have a hard life. You wake up every morning, and go to your day job. After work, you come home eat and watch television. Monday through Friday is your routine, then Friday evenings you hang out. Saturdays are lounge or errand days, while Sundays prepare you for Monday. The majority of people on Earth will live like this until they die. So to them, an existence might be rather mundane. But that only tells me the their daily regimen. What about if they have utilities piling up, rent to pay, mortgages, loans, and personal expenses. The average person struggles financially, meaning you’re more than likely not working a job you like. And this is where the saying life is unfair comes into play.

But let’s pause for a second. This in itself only tells me people’s hardships. It does not explain why life is unfair. That’s because in reality life is not unfair; life is very fair, too fair to be real about it. What is unfair is the aspect of dealing with people. If every human on Earth vanished and you were the only one left, what would be your hardest struggle. A lot of people would say survival. But you now have unlimited fruits, vegetables, water, resources for shelter and clothing. How can life be a struggle? Because people regulate food and water. I live near the Atlantic Ocean, and if I were hungry and needed food, it would be a crime to fish from the water. So most people would say life isn’t fair. But life is the waters, life is the sea life. There is nothing unfair about that. It’s people who established a gaming commission so I can’t fish.

In the end, we feel that so much around us is unfair. Yet the Earth has an abundance of resources. The fact that you don’t have the access is not that life is unfair. People have created means of making it virtually impossible to gain access to those resources.  So the way to thrive throughout life is not to think of life as unfair. But if you can manage to navigate the minefield that is us, humans on Earth, then you’ll be fine.