HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE: INTO THE MIND OF THE BROKEN

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“Thee broken hearted.”


WHO ARE THEY

Those who are the broken hearted people in our society come from a wide range of backgrounds. Some of them grew up with hurt and pain in their lives while others came across it later on. They have dealt with so much hurt that now they have put the shoe on the other foot. Yet when they decide to hurt people, they hurt those who are innocent. I guess to them they feel if it can happen to me, and nothing is done, why not anyone else.

INTO THE LINE OF FIRE

You see someone you’re interested in getting to know, yet little do you know, they are broken. You want to either be their friend or partner in a relationship, but they have been upset by others over and over again. Now you are about to be their first victim. You’re a good person, but damn, how did you all of a sudden become their target. Everyone else ran away, but you literally walked straight into their cross hairs. Now, you’re about to feel the full grunt of years of abuse. Strap in and prepare for lift-off.

GOING DEEPER

I remember watching a movie by filmmaker M. Night Shyamalan entitled, “Split.” The movie is about a man with split personalities who kidnaps three young females. Everyday, the girls come in contact with a different personality, until he kills three and leaves one alive. He was about to kill the third, but once he saw her deep cuts on the wrist, he stated, “The broken ones are always the purest.” The girl had sliced her wrist, a sign of some internalized pain. Turns out she had been molested by her uncle for years, who now has custody over her. The broken people’s hurt runs so deep, it can go back until childhood and last forever.

IN THEIR WAKE LIES CARNAGE

Problem with those who have been hurt is that they generally hurt others. Those people at times are so hurt that they hurt others, and the chain reaction leads to a society of damaged people. We never get into the minds of the hurt, the broken, the damaged. Because if you could see deep within them, they hurt, they cut their wrist, all because they want to turn people away from them. Hurt others and themselves so they don’t appear attractive so they can have an excuse to remain aloof. Yet what they really want is someone who truly loves, truly cares, sometimes, someone who is just as broke as them who understands why they hurt.


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ALL EYES ON YOU: WHY YOU THINK SOMEONE IS ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT YOU

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“Why we think they’re all laughing.”


Why at times in our minds when we walk into a room, do we think that everyone is watching us or talking about us? This inner feeling that the people around us have this feeling that they don’t want to express how they feel, but it’s present. This mentality that someone or everyone is watching you may not be as serious as you may think. It can be a real mental problem that you as that person have that you have to work out internally. Well, why might we feel this way even from some of the most confident people?

A reason we feel this way is because there is something wrong with us that we know exist. And if someone is intently looking at us, then they have figured out the thing that is wrong. And if they figured out the thing that is wrong without our input, then what else do they know that I haven’t told them. When you are uncomfortable about something that you hope no one knows about, it can be a very debilitating feeling. This feeling can keep us from making friends, dating, or even coexisting in our daily lives. So how do we combat this problem that we have built internally?

Well, you have to learn to be confident in who you are because people can feel it. When you lack confidence, it’s almost as if there is a light bulb over your head that says I am unsure. So this light follows you everywhere because it is in your body language. From the way your head drops when you walk into a room or even how you talk without letting people fully hear what is coming out of your mouth. Your entire aura speaks I am not sure of myself. And what person is uninteresting enough to want to be around if they feel this way.So if you want to stop feeling this sense of internal insecurity, you have to address the real issue. The real issue may be something you’re hiding that you don’t want others to see or know.


My Personal Website: www.faheemjackson.squarespace.com

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WHY DO SOME PEOPLE TEND TO WANT TO HOLD ON TO INTERNAL PAIN

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“Why hold on when you don’t need to do so?”


Holding on to internalized pain is something that so many people do on a daily basis. And I am not referring to the people who seek out therapy as means of getting out of a dark place. I am referring to the people who can change their lives. The people who can move from a place of pain and live a good life on the other side. They refuse to do so because in some weird way it makes them unique to say that they have this problem. It’s a way to get attention from those around them. And if they cure themselves of whatever it is they’re going through, then what are they to do now. So they hold on to their problems because they never want to feel like they’re not special.

Only problem with these types of people is that they actually start to annoy the ones close to them. At first, everyone was trying to help them. And loving the attention makes this person stay in that mind-frame. But after a while, those that cared about you will eventually give you an automaton. That’s when you realized that you have gone from being someone they wanted to help to a burden on the family. This could ultimately be the wake up call that some people need in life. But there are still others that are the “me” people who you just have to separate yourself from; for good. They will only further cause you to become more enraged by their lack of taking responsibility for their actions. Now my question is, “Where does it come from within that makes a person want to hold on to pain besides a fear of not being special anymore?”

Another reason people who can change choose to still hold on is because once you release you’re expected to do better in life. Putting yourself in the know means leaving behind how you once thought to move into this new space of peace. So many want to not only stay in their place of turmoil, but want you to join them. Now why would anyone want someone else or many people to join them in turmoil? The reason being that no one wants to live alone wallowing in in their own garbage. They love to see not only other people with them, but other people who are successful.And success is important because if the once successful person is now wallowing in garbage, now that is confirmation in the hurt person’s head that thank God they didn’t attempt at life to change. Because in the end, who truly want to look in the mirror and say I have a problem and it starts with me. Yet, the more you are able to, the more you move into a space of internal peace.


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LAWS OF ATTRACTION: WHY GOOD LOOKING IS MORE THAN LOOKING GOOD

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“You can’t help who you like.”


The laws of attraction are an aspect of our daily lives that is kind of hard to explain. I have had to deal with having an attraction to someone and that someone was actually in a relationship. But you can’t help the physiological feeling you get when you come across someone. They have a different impact on you that makes you kind of lose your cool. They have your undivided attention and for some reason, you tend to listen when they speak a lot more than others. I have had this exist only a few times in my life, and each time the person was in a monogamous relationship. Yet even with the relationship, it still didn’t matter because you have this feeling. Now, it’s not infatuation or the feeling to stalk, yet it makes you unfettered by the idea that that person is in a relationship. So where does this euphoric feeling come from.

I don’t know where it comes from, and my feeling was toward two coworkers in the same work environment. It wasn’t so much as the two people were physically attractive as it was their perceived confidence. Their assurance in themselves made them quite appealing to me. But was that all. Maybe the idea of me not being able to date them is something else that made them more attractive. Because it’s like the saying, “We all want something we can’t have.” And the problem is, is that once we do get the thing we wanted, sometimes it’s not even that big of a deal. The idea of wanting it seems that much more special, than actually having it. So like I asked before, “Where does it come from?” And I am not referring to just finding someone attractive. I’m talking about being so into them, that you don’t want to hurt their significant other, but the other is just not important to you.

Well, there all kinds of definitions for why we have these attractions to one another. You would think that there is this one aspect of life we can look to and say that, that it. But the reality is that attraction is not just a physical attraction, but the energy the person gives off. Me, for example, I give off the energy that I am not in the mood to be bothered. But in getting to know me, I have a lot of knowledge and a lot to say. But the problem is, is when you are an introvert in your personal life, and an extrovert in your career pursuits people get confused. When it comes to my career goals, I jump right out there. But my personal life is more of a, “Who is he, and why does he exist really.” Whereas my career pursuit is, “I jump, knowing I can and may fall flat on my face, but I do it anyways.” So when people find out I have an attraction to someone it strikes takes them by surprise because I am not this open book person.

In the end, the laws of attraction, the energy that someone lets off makes you like them for some reason. Whenever they come around, your mood shifts, and it becomes difficult to be in their presence. But you manage to do so, even at the cost sometimes of being uncomfortable internally. And sometimes, just sometimes; you are able to tell them how you genuinely feel.


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