TALKING A GOOD GAME: WHY SOME REFUSE TO WALK AS MUCH AS THEY TALK

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“You got all these dreams, well, put it to the test.”


You ever meet those people who have all these animated ways in which they explain all their dreams and expectations? Or how about the people that can sell you hopes and dreams of what they promise to do for you once they become successful (usually men who lie to women fall under this category). There is just one problem with these types of people in life. They are the groups of people who can talk the talk, but when it comes time to walk, it’s a whole other ball game. My current pursuit is filmmaking, and I’m sure there are people out there way more knowledgeable than myself. But they cannot put the pen to the paper and write their script. They’re not able to pitch that script nor are they able to make it into a film. When it comes to knowing all the technical lingo and classical filmmakers, they know it all, yet execution of their plans fall short.

You want to know why these guys and gals never remotely go anywhere? It all comes down to daydreaming and fears. Do you remember the movie Collateral with Jamie Foxx as the cab driver and Tom Cruise, the hire hitman, in the backseat. Jamie Foxx tells Cruise of all his plans for his own Mercedes Benz car service, yet Foxx’s reason for not starting is the money to get it off the ground: staffing, cars, and other logistics. Near the end of the film Cruise finally tells Foxx, you were never going to do it anyways. You are going to spend your life drowned out by daytime television like a lot of people when all it took was a down payment on a Lincoln Towncar to get started. And just like that, Jamie knew what that meant. Jamie could talk a good game, but when it came to actually putting himself out there, he couldn’t do it.

Jamie even went as far as to lie to his mother in the hospital as if he were really working for himself. At lunch, Foxx would even flip through the pages of a Mercedes pamphlet to see the fleets available. A lot of people do this; looking at what they wish they owned and daydream. The fear of launching comes from not feeling you’re good enough or worried of what others will think of you. Yet truly successful people don’t listen to what others have to say, they are doers. If you’re listening too much to what others say, you’re not progressing. You see, in the end, I was never a guy who was good at talking a good game. And sometimes, I even admired the people who can because I have more of a walking ability than talking. But in life, the one walking is more in alignment with success than the one who talks all the time.


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CONQUERING FEAR THAT ISN’T FEAR AT ALL

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“Made up problems that really don’t exist.”


Failure to launch is the term we use for someone that has a hard time stepping into the world and being on their own. They do so because they either don’t have anything that they are passionate about, or don’t have any goals. And when you don’t have goals you just sit around hoping for things to fall into place. But as long as you’re not putting yourself into harms way, then things can’t happen to you. But the harms way is the main reason why so many people will not step into society. Now me on the other hand, I love the risk, I love the fear, I love the unknown. I have a short film I will be producing in less the 11 days, and have no clue how it will go. The project could flow, or I could run into multiple problems. My first short film I had problems, but it was a learning experience for my second one. But what is it about what I do that makes it so hard for so many others to do?

You see, growing up, my mother always kept my sisters and myself in the library and school. She made sure we were in academic environments, or some other environment where I had to get in the game of life. So I fear, but I still do anyways. And there is a reason for me not quitting out of fear. It’s because I have been prepped to step into the world knowing I will fall before I gain my Image result for mother silhouettefooting. My mother told her children growing up, “Struggle through your 20’s, to have a life you want afterward in your 30’s and so forth.” So for me, it’s second nature for me to attack in life. And my mother wasn’t some PhD or Master’s Degree holder. She only had a high school diploma, and nothing more than that. Yett she was willing to put herself in the know when it came to raising her children. And that know has made her children fearless to step into the world.

Now, as far as the people who fail to rise to the occasion, like I said earlier, they have these fears. What’s odd is that they are usually the extroverted people. The introverts always so much more successful in their careers. It’s odd because if the extroverts used that outgoing personality then they would be so much more successful. For some reason, they don’t see it that way. It’s for that
reason that extroverts I feel need an opposite to befriend or be in relationships with. And like the extroverts, introverts need someone who is more fearless in their pursuit of personal happiness. I grew upRelated image with so many people that if they put that extrovert personality to use they could be on a whole other level. But what is interesting is that they look at me and say, “How do you do that?” As if I have some sort of magical power. I don’t have any magic powers, it’s just that I fall and get up because I know falling is an aspect of life.

See, in the end, you should approach success like approaching hanging out with friends. The same way you network in your friendships, you network in your career endeavors. When you try meeting new people, do you give up when someone does not want to hang with you? No, you just hang around people that want to hang around you. It’s the same with success; you have to put yourself out there. And the reason they don’t is the fear: fear of what others think, fear of failing, and fear of having to continue to satisfy. But me, I want the risk, I love the unknown, I love the fear; it’s what makes me feel alive.


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SHARING FEARS: WHAT ARE MINE AND HOW DO I DEAL WITH THEM

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“We all run from something.”


Author Marianne Williamson has a very well-known passage in her book The Return of Love regarding our deepest fears. And she states that, “It’s not that we are inadequate, it’s that we are powerful beyond measure.” We don’t want to think that we are less than at sometime in life, then to realize we were destined for greatness in that thing. But what I would like to open up about are my own personal fears. And the top three fears of mine: dying destitute and poor, not attaining my goals, and monogamous relationships. Fears that have plagued me since I was a young child all the way into my adult years.

Well, let’s first start by looking at my first in life. My first fear of dying broke and destitute is number one. So much so, that even as a kid I thought growing poor my life would never change. And now that I am an adult, I see abandoned, adult, black-and-whitehomeless people walking the streets of New York City. They converse with themselves. They have no friends and no family, but most of all, having to come to terms with sleeping in the city streets. What reality that must be, that wow, I am about to fall asleep for the first time on a park bench or in the subway system. What must that feel like that first night with no roof over your head. And that fear has made me not want to really enjoy too much of life because you just never know.

Which leads into my next fear; and that is the fear of not attaining my goals. I can go out, and get a job, work until my retirement, but that’s not good enough. There are career interests that I have, that are not quite conventional. But if not successful at them, very little in life is worth doing. I am not interested in a lot of stuff people in my age group are interested in. I black wallpaper, black-and-white, boxerdon’t mind working on my indie projects and making $50,000 to $60,000 a year. I could easily rise in a corporate atmosphere and make well beyond that amount. But it’s not the title or the climb in an organization. It’s the ability to have a voice and say what I want and get paid to do so.

As far as my relationship phobias, I have multiple ones. They are phobias such as: fear of having to compromise, fear of rejection, fear of infidelity, fear of having to connect, and fear of failure. These have kept me from pursuing a relationship since the age of 16 years old all the way to now I am about to be 30 years old. As much as my previous passage about fear of not achieving exist, I still push forward. To be Image result for rejectionhonest, I don’t even think about the fear of failure in career endeavor. Mainly because I was raised at such a young age to pursue, it’s normal now. For example, my first short film was not that great, and I already working on the crowdfunding for my next one. It’s not even a thought at times because it has become such a norm. Yet when seeking relationships, it has not been a pursuit of mine. So now it seems odd to do so.

In the end, we all have these crazy fears. But conquering your fears is a lot easier said than done. You try your best to persevere past them, but they’re there. And maybe that is a nature thing put inside of us to keep us safe. Only problem with being safe is that I don’t want safe. Vulnerability is a very intriguing trait that I like. I don’t want to be homeless, but I am chasing a career path that could lead to that. I don’t want to fail at my goals, yet I am actively attaining them. I don’t want to not have a relationship, but I am pushing to set myself up for monogamy. So let me ask you something, how do you take on your fears?


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