Tag: #dates

CHIVALRY DIED, O-K: ARE MEN STILL EXPECTED TO PLAY THE ROLE

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“It’s what you’re supposed to just do.”

rule of engagement

When it comes to men and women meeting each other in society, the initial meeting is the same as it has always been. Boy meets girl, girl says yes, then they go on the initial date as planned generally by the male who expressed interest. But we are in a society today that goes against the conventional rules. Yet, we are still driven to a degree by the process that most lived with an aspect of our new school. And that is something is up for debate today because should men pay for dates. Should women of today be expected to take on the role. Or should we have a society that is a little bit of both?

women of today

In the America that we live in today, more and more women are in positions of power. That means with that comes a degree of standards that exist like no other time in history. And this is where women fall into this grey area. Because men in that same position, our standards don’t really sway that much. All it means for men is that we have more options to explore. Why, well we are very on the surface type of creatures. We start at physical and work our way from there. So when women are looking for mates in a certain tax bracket and men don’t care about the bracket, then women will have to find themselves successful competing against women with nothing to show for in life.

proper treatment

In the case of going on dates, for the me I do think that the men should pay simply because we are the ones trying to get with the woman. Not too many women asking us on dates. So when you ask someone on the date, then asks that they pay, you are part of a much wider problem. If you wanted them to pay for you, you should wait for them to ask you on a date. The person that ask is reaching out because they are the pursuer. Now, women can pursue as well, but most of the time, we are trying to get them to be with us.

change of times

As we have moved on through the decades, men and women have switched roles on a variety of areas. But what will all this mean for women seeking to find a potential mate? And to answer the question, a lot of women are going to be single in the future to come. And the reason why I said single, men are not looking for financially stable equals. We are looking for persona over what the woman has in her bank account.

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PLAYING GAMES ONLY YOU CAN LOSE: WHY WOMEN IN PLAYER WORLD GETS HURT IN THE END

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“Two can’t play the game.”

In the world of dating, both men and women tend to play games. But there is a catch when it comes to the world of playing games. And that is that only one person winds-up getting hurt. And usually it is the woman that gets hurt. Why is that; why is it that the woman is always getting hurt? Well, because the woman cannot win at the end of the day. Now if you’re a woman, you might think to yourself, that’s not right. But in reality it is true; you are far more likely to get hurt. Now mind you, once again, I am talking about the game of playing, not just your typical monogamous relationship. When you’re in the game of playing, there is generally a winner and a loser. But let’s get into the reasons why the woman get hurt at the end of the day.

The reason the woman gets hurt in the playing game is because when you look at the game, there is a shelf life associated with women playing the game. Almost like looking at yourself as an athlete. You come into league running and jumping like everyone else, but you start to get older. And the problem with getting older is you can’t run and jump on the basketball court like you used to. You have to learn certain skills to stay in the game. Only problem is that it’s a young woman’s game to play to try to win. So now you’re 35 years of age in the arenas of 23 and 24 year old girls because you want to stay relevant to the men that are chasing after them. And with no prior exit strategy, you find yourself alone while he goes off into the sunset with someone else. And this happens due to the standards of men versus women.

Men and women have similar but not same standards, especially in the playing game. Women “need” a man worth something to play, and the man can be with whatever. Because he just needs an attractive woman, and what you need is harder to come by in the game. So you’re really becoming subservient to whatever he’s willing and able to do. Basically what I’m saying is that in the world of playing, you really can’t hold us to anything because we can always get another woman. You as a woman can’t just run out and easily get another top notch, successful guy to be with you. Now, I’m not talking about on average, I’m talking in this playing game. Your standards in the game are higher, so you are in a more compromising position than we are in the game. Let me go even further and describe how it can hurt you.

On average, a man looks for a woman he’s compatible with, and vice versa. But in the playing game, your age is a major determinant as a woman. I’ll give you another example, you trying to play is like the drug game. The woman is equivalent to the guy standing on the street corner while we as men are more like distributors or cartel bosses. You take on the most risk as women, and usually come out the most hurt. And in the end, that’s why women may not want to play. And if you do, have an exit strategy. Because two people can be hurt in the game, but more often it’s you because your standards are higher. We can marry the first thing we see, you generally don’t live by that same creed.

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LEVELS: WHAT IS THE REAL MEANING OF A LEAGUE IN DATING

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“Is your league a real league?”

When you’re young, you ever hear someone say that you should date in your league? But once you start to get older, you realize that a lot of the leagues you thought were real leagues are not leagues at all. And that is when you are able to navigate around the a lot of the loud noise that you can’t date someone that society says you are not supposed to date. But what is it? What are real leagues? Because when you are young the league is based around what clothing you’re wearing. Or better yet, how physically attractive you are; from your body type to your facial region. You are also determined by how up to date you are on the latest gadget everyone owns. But then you age and realize the true meaning of a league. And that’s when your mind starts to really open up. So why don’t you see that at your young age?

The reason you don’t know what a league is, is because there is to some degree a lack of self-awareness you have when you are coming through your teens and even your twenties. You’re also not as well traversed about the world around you. A league is much more important than just the article of clothing and your body type, it’s how far you’ve come in life thus far. Where are you in relation to most males and females your age. Now this can be difficult because we all have our individual journeys. But you should still be making some type of stride in the direction you want to head in, in life. And if you are making the appropriate adjustments to being where you want to be, then you are allowed to have a league. And who are those people not allowed to have a league?

Well, the men and women who live at home with their parents, yet they demand that the person they date have their lives together. A woman who works a part-time job who demands her man has a substantial means of income; and man who lacks ambition wanting to not have a woman sitting around doing nothing. We seem to think that we’re all being rational in our relationship pursuits, until you ask the question, where are you in life. When you look over your life so far, are you proud to say that you are where you want to be? And a lot of people can’t say that. So if you are satisfied, then you are of the bunch that are on a collision course with greatness. And that my friend is the definition of a league. Asking for the things in life that you are willing to push for and/or have already that you expect from someone else.

In the end, we look on television, inside of a magazine, or browsing the internet. We look at certain people having a certain lifestyle and we say that is what I want. But instead of saying I will build it myself, or meet someone and we can build each other to that point, we want someone else to give us something. But we come into the situation with nothing, acting as if it is something, and that is our basis for a foundation. Then time pass, and you realize your league was a non-league. Now you must play catch-up in life before you get left behind. And hopefully you have not wasted too much time and you can rebound.

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FREE LOVE: HOW WOMEN’S RATIONALIZATION FOR MONOGAMY CAN HURT THEM

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“You’re not worth it, yet I’ll still engage.”

When observing women in relationships, I have taken notice to certain ways in which women have communicated the men they choose. And I have to say at times, when I hear the logic for why women talk to certain men, it is rather disturbing. And the reason I say disturbing is because you always hear women speak about not being able to find a good man. Yet the rationale for how women go about getting into a long lasting relationship at times tends to teeter on the fulcrum between irrational choices and insanity. And when I say insanity, I don’t mean seeking immediate help, I mean doing the same thing over and over, hoping for a different outcome.

Now, what do I mean by all of this; I mean the irrationality starts with the method of choosing. See in the past, women had to bring home men to their fathers. That is not so much so the case in today’s society. And the reason for this is because men know men, but women seem to think in today’s society they do. So women tend to make decision on emotion, while it’s not that case for men. Initially, men Image result for women datemake choices on the basis of aesthetics. Sorry women, but no matter how smart you are, or what you have going for you, that is learned into the relationship. That very first introduction is what we see physically. So women in the past would bring the guy to meet dad. Dad went down this road himself, and he just knows the deal. But are there other methods of choosing that hurt women.

Yes, there are; and it has to do with sexuality. In today’s society, women have this taking back my sexuality viewpoint. But there are still some open gaps in the views. Like they’ll say, “The man I marry, I’m making him wait because I care, but the guy I don’t care about didn’t have to wait.” My response to you is, “Do you normally sleep with guys not worth your time?” Because look at the message Image result for women sexualityyou’re sending out. If someone isn’t worth your time, why are they getting into bed with you at all? Saying I give it up to this guy because he ain’t worth it devalues who you are in life. Something on a nature level is not being told here. There is something about the person you’re likely to spend life with that’s not interesting. Because using logic, the guy you wind-up with should have an easy life. Yet the one not worth it gets so much of your fun loving energy.

Now the insanity to all this, is the fact that women consistently get the same guy over and over. And like I said before about hoping for different outcomes, it becomes insane. You get two, maybe three of the same person. But once you Related imageconsistently date the same person, it’s no longer you getting the short end of the stick. There is something you like about the same person. You know there is a pattern, yet you like something about them. But the moment it goes really bad, you’re searching for answers as to why. And that is the craziest thing about women’s choices sometimes, is the scrambling for answers.

And in the end, that is the just of what women do at times when choosing a mate. You know in your gut things are bad. Yet at times, you will try to trick yourself into thinking otherwise. Whatever this person is providing you with outside what you need is keeping you there. And my best guess is that men who are worth being with and responsible are less passionate. We are taught to be providers, workers, productive, and efficient. Men not worth your time, bad boys, have no real ambition, goals, yet they are passionate in dating. Why, well it’s because they typically have nothing else they’re good at. So now women are left to choose between average passion and great man, or intense passion and shitty boyfriend.

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UNDERSTANDING YOUR PAST FOR A BETTER FUTURE

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“Moving toward the future, from understanding your past.”

Why do people find it so hard to move forward in their lives? One of the reasons is they have yet to come to terms with their past. And don’t get me wrong, your past does not automatically translate into future. But something that has happened in your past is a reason you make your decisions today. And if you are not able to understand this past, then how will you move forward. For instance, a woman might be trying to figure out why she has such bad experiences with men. Then she realizes she never had a relationship with her own father. And as the old saying goes, you link up with, as a man or woman, your previous relationship with a parent.

Now that’s an interesting concept; you wind-up with your parent. Because choosing a potential spouse is such a daunting task in itself. So who raises you from childhood to adulthood is crucial. Now, there is no guarantee that you’re going to have a great relationship if you’re raised with these great parents. But statistically, those raised in two parent households go off to have more successful marriages. And if you are having problems with your relationships or finding a successful relationship, look into your own life. Where in your life is there a link between you and your parent. You might also have been raised in good surroundings, but other aspects like controlling parents or not enough transparency didn’t prepare you for monogamy.

What about other aspects of your past that could affect your future. Issues that you have that keep you from advancing in your career. Very rarely have past performances that are poor, lead to future good performances. Unless, you recognize the past poor performances and correct them for the future. For instance, I am currently working on my next short film. My first one was ok, but there are some things I need to correct for my next one. If I am making the same mistakes, then I have not learned my lesson. So career choices in the future can haunt you if not curbed early on. But small things we tend to avoid, and later make those mistakes that effect in a much greater way years later.

Then again, is coming to grips with your past always lending itself to family situations and career? No, other reasons you look into your past, could be how to make the decisions for the future. You want to learn how to save money, well, analyze your past poor monetary choices. You want to buy a house, then lose the ways of renting because you’re the boss now. In the end, we all have something in our past that can determine the outcome of our future. It might be something as simple as adjusting your monetary expenses or fixing your love life. No matter what, be willing to look into your past and figure out what’s holding you down from accomplishing your future goals.

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RELATIONSHIP CURRENCY: WHAT DO YOU VALUE IN RELATIONSHIPS

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“If cash is king, where do relationships stand?”

Relationships throughout history have always taken on different forms as time progressed. But in today’s society there are so many meanings for what relationship currency stand for. How do you define what it means to have relationship currency? Now when I say relationships it can mean marriage or even a friendship. Currency can mean something of monetary value or it can mean something of mental/emotional value. I am here to ask which one is important to you. A lot of people say money and others say what someone has to offer. Some people want a monogamous relationship others don’t. So which is important to you?

The majority of people in society hear relationship and automatically think it has to do with dating or marriage. But what about friendships; how important is friendships and what is their currency. We usually dictate friendship by what the person has to bring emotionally to the table. Because what is the use in hanging around people who are not in your best interest. And what I mean by that, it’s heading in the same direction as you. This doesn’t mean you want to be a physician they should be doctors. No, it should mean that they have some type of goal in life. If they don’t and you do, you guys will fall apart from each other. So relationship currency in friendships should be pushing each other to do better which translate into non-monetary currency.

Well, what about monogamous relationships, currency is important here. But what type of currency? What type of currency is important to you in a relationship? Let’s observe from an emotional standpoint. When you’re looking at monogamy from an emotional standpoint, then you’re talking about how much meaning you bring into someones’ life. This means that when one of you are weak, how well does the other counteract that weakness with strength. And that in itself can be seen as sometimes and even greater form of currency than the monetary. But what about the monetary? There are people that look to this as a form of currency in relationships.

When in monogamous relationship, having an income coming into the house is very important. Maybe not when you’re in your early twenties, but what about once you hit your thirties. Once you get to this point, it’s the getting your life together point. The time where you need to really have it carved in stone where you would like to see yourself in the years to come. Now, money isn’t everything, but when you’re talking about settling down and having a family, you need to keep this in mind. Take into consideration the cost of buying a home, car, paying off any debts, and long term investments like retirement. This is where monetary currency is very important to your future success in a monogamous relationship.

In the end, the meaning of relationship currency can take on many different meanings. It’s up to the person/s interpreting what the currency means or even what the word relationship means. No matter how you look at it, know the currency you are looking for, but also know what your value is as well.