A LACK OF COMMUNICATION: WHY WE NEED TO TALK MORE

Two Women Sitting on Chairs Beside Window

“Face to face is still important.”


put your devices down

There is a problem in America today and that is we do not have face to face communication with our youth that will prepare them for the world ahead. These smart devices are making it tough for a generation to survive. Because when you step into the workforce you are going to be dealing with a lot of people face to face. So how do we get people, especially young people to place their devices to the side and make sure they are communicating face to face. Because without these key skills, you will have a very hard time succeeding in the world. And so much of who you are is predicated on what you do for a living. So where do we start to help people?

losing the ability to talk

A strong trait of mine is the ability to have an objective opinion. I also like listening and speaking to people that I philosophically disagree with, but just listening to them speak is something of importance. Recently Ellen DeGeneres was chastised by people who said she should not be speaking to former President Bush because he is of a different party. To me that is the most uneducated person or people who make those types of statements. In order to effectively communicate you have to be able to have a link of communication with those you disagree with. Especially someone like a leader of the country who you will depend upon to make decisions that will effect your life.

if the machine breaks down

Ever think what people would do if these social media platforms just started shutting down? Because you have people who solely depend on these platforms to express themselves. Now, it’s not the end of the world because we existed before it all. But it would like to see who is able to cope once it is gone. Because prior to the boom of social sites, people really only dealt with their inner circle and then they tuned out to the world. Now we have a constant cycle of news letting you know something. And the problem with this, is that it can lead to more problems than it solves. So you have to learn to disconnect at some point in order to cope in the world.


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DATING ALLEGATIONS: WOULD YOU TELL SOMEONE CLOSE TO YOU ABOUT A CHEATING PARTNER

Image result for CHEATING

“To talk or not to talk.”


Having a friend in a relationship can be a new adjustment if you guys have both been single for so long. Now this new person comes in the mix and everything is different. But that is not the topic of today; the topic of today is sharing information with your friend regarding their significant other. What if you had proof that your friend’s significant other was talking to someone else on the side? Would you inform your friend that this person was out talking to someone else? Or would you keep the information to yourself? Telling your friend could mean an argument depending on how they felt about the person. But keeping it a secret could mean jeopardizing the friendship as well.

Let’s observe the outcomes of telling your friend. See, if you tell your friend it could go a few ways. The first is that your friend is proud that you would bring the information to them. Allowing them the access into what is going on behind their backs is really important. But there is another outcome from telling them. That is that they might lash out at you for telling them. You don’t know how they feel and it could backfire ending a friendship. So, so many people tend to not say anything and leave the situation alone. But even that has repercussions to it. What are the repercussions for not telling your friend about their significant other?

That’s right, there is the other side of the coin. And that is not telling your friend what happened. This could have its own set of problems by not speaking. Because once your friend finds out what happened and you knew, now what comes of the friendship. When they found out you know, it will put a serious damper on the relationship. Especially if you are their best friend, they expect you to say something before anyone says something. So then if they are mad for you not saying anything, and mad for you saying anything, then what? And it all boils down to the friendship that you and this other person have together.

In the end, friends usually have an understanding whether they would want someone to say something. If you don’t have an understanding with your friend, then it can go good or bad. With no communication, it can go in any direction.



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FORCED FEELINGS: WHY WE GIVE PEOPLE WHAT THEY SHOULD ALREADY KNOW

Man and Woman Sitting on Sidewalk

“What is meant to be, is meant to be.”


When looking for a relationship, we all have our negotiables, and I our non-negotiables. The actions in the relationship that we will and won’t stand for from the other person. But my question to you is, is everything that we define as a negotiable and nonnegotiable, should it always be implied? Because I have heard women make statements that at times they need to imply to men to behave a certain way. But I say, why, why are you telling a grown man how he should behave in a relationship. And I have a theory as to why. But for starters, why do we have these negotiable and nonnegotiable standards?

Well, we have these standards so that the other person knows what we will and won’t stand for in the situation. But another reason we have them is to give the other person a heads up that we have a certain level of respect for ourselves. The third reason is that we also want to see how well the other person communicates what they like and dislike. I know it sounds a little trite, but communication is key. Without a clear line of communication, the relationship won’t work. So now that I have given a quick overview into why we have negotiables and nonnegotiables, what is an underlying reason for them? Meaning, what do I sense from hearing you tell someone certain things they should already know.

For example, why are you telling someone they need to respect you in a relationship. Once you reach a certain age, you should just know how to talk to someone. Now, like I said earlier, women especially feel they need to explain themselves because some guys are not respectable. But hey now, hold the phone. Why are you having to tell a grown man he has to respect you? And if so, that doesn’t sound like a good situation. The situation should be more so based around you just going with the flow, and seeing who and what he’s about. Now, I have a theory into why you might give people golden nuggets of advice.

When you meet someone that you’re attracted to, you don’t want to lose this person. So if you’re giving them golden nuggets of advice in how to treat you, then they are going to react to what you say. So if you tell a man he must respect you, he will. But to me, it sounds like forced feelings of grander. What do I mean, you won’t just let this person show their real selves because what if this person does trip up and disrespect you. Now you have to get rid of this person you like. So you tell them how to treat you, and especially a man, we’ll play off the actions. Eventually he shows his true self because the feeling of giving you respect was forced in the beginning. And you don’t want forced feelings, they should be real.

In the end, we give people information in how to treat us not just as a heads-up so they know, but we want them to stay. So we give them information in what to do and not what to do because we want them in our lives. They will play off those actions of what we want. You love Valentines Day, you’re getting roses because it means something to you. You love God, we’re going to church because I know a nonnegotiable of yours is a faith base. What you should do is remain silent. See if they’ll bring up religion on their own, or special holidays. Make them figure it our, and if they slip up, you might have to get rid of them. Not because everyone makes mistakes, but because you might be dodging a bullet that could hurt you in the long run.


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