FEMININE PLIGHT: WHY IT’S HARDER FOR WOMEN TO FIND MARRIAGE THAN ME

bride, cake, ceremony

“They need more than we do.”


When seeking out a potential mate in a relationship, I am quite lucky to be a guy in society. As a man with two sisters, I can tell you first hand that the life of a woman is a hell of a lot harder when choosing a mate than men. And the reason why I say that is because it’s almost like men are this lottery ticket that they (women) need to scratch to see if we’re worth something. Men can hold on to a lotto ticket that is less valuable and it not reflect on us in society. So a man can look for a woman outside of her accomplishments, while the woman choose based on his treatment of her and his accomplishments. We are more inclined to be able to sway while it’s harder for women. Why is that, is it that women have to maintain a certain decor that we don’t; is it societal or biological.

Well, there is a biological and a societal aspect of women choosing men to be in relationships. The societal reasons why has to do with how we over time have constructed our civilizations to make women choose. If you are a very successful woman with a less successful guy, then a question of your standards comes in play. A man can be a CEO in a relationship with a school teacher, yet it’s harder on the flip-side. Number one, him lower than her on the financial totem pole is hard for her because women are told in society that he need to be somewhere near her. She is seen as irresponsible and he is seen as lacking as a man. But we are totally aloud to be with a woman with less, and at times nothing at all. So as much as we think we’re in this new equal space its still not so. But where does nature lie in the choosing of a mate.

A lot! Nature plays a major role in how women have to choose as well. A man who is more successful and more productive is naturally seen as more attractive. Why, well from a nature response there is a procreating piece that women start to think about in regards to having a family. His productivity and efficiency is stable enough to start a family with him. There is a physiological action that takes place internally that women shut down a lot quicker than men. So when a man approaches a woman, they (women) quickly start to process their response, constantly thinking forward as to their response because of their vulnerable position. And the older the woman get, the harder it becomes to find a mate because there are so many social stigmas attached to why she is not married with children.

In the end, men are like pretty girls when we are successful. And at times, more beautiful than the women who want to be with us. Meaning, we have the key to what you want in us. You need a man whose doing something and going somewhere in life. We can have and we cannot have it. So for the woman it’s a tougher go, and a lot of women settle for someone she never thought she would be dating. Then there are the group who just spend their lives dating around and never marry and have children. They become a second mom to their nieces and nephews if they have them. All because the guy she wanted is not at her level or near. Meanwhile we choose when we want and how we want, and it’s all a matter of how we feel about her as a woman, not necessarily where she is at in her career.


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FREE LOVE: HOW WOMEN’S RATIONALIZATION FOR MONOGAMY CAN HURT THEM

Related image

“You’re not worth it, yet I’ll still engage.”


When observing women in relationships, I have taken notice to certain ways in which women have communicated the men they choose. And I have to say at times, when I hear the logic for why women talk to certain men, it is rather disturbing. And the reason I say disturbing is because you always hear women speak about not being able to find a good man. Yet the rationale for how women go about getting into a long lasting relationship at times tends to teeter on the fulcrum between irrational choices and insanity. And when I say insanity, I don’t mean seeking immediate help, I mean doing the same thing over and over, hoping for a different outcome.

Now, what do I mean by all of this; I mean the irrationality starts with the method of choosing. See in the past, women had to bring home men to their fathers. That is not so much so the case in today’s society. And the reason for this is because men know men, but women seem to think in today’s society they do. So women tend to make decision on emotion, while it’s not that case for men. Initially, men Image result for women datemake choices on the basis of aesthetics. Sorry women, but no matter how smart you are, or what you have going for you, that is learned into the relationship. That very first introduction is what we see physically. So women in the past would bring the guy to meet dad. Dad went down this road himself, and he just knows the deal. But are there other methods of choosing that hurt women.

Yes, there are; and it has to do with sexuality. In today’s society, women have this taking back my sexuality viewpoint. But there are still some open gaps in the views. Like they’ll say, “The man I marry, I’m making him wait because I care, but the guy I don’t care about didn’t have to wait.” My response to you is, “Do you normally sleep with guys not worth your time?” Because look at the message Image result for women sexualityyou’re sending out. If someone isn’t worth your time, why are they getting into bed with you at all? Saying I give it up to this guy because he ain’t worth it devalues who you are in life. Something on a nature level is not being told here. There is something about the person you’re likely to spend life with that’s not interesting. Because using logic, the guy you wind-up with should have an easy life. Yet the one not worth it gets so much of your fun loving energy.

Now the insanity to all this, is the fact that women consistently get the same guy over and over. And like I said before about hoping for different outcomes, it becomes insane. You get two, maybe three of the same person. But once you Related imageconsistently date the same person, it’s no longer you getting the short end of the stick. There is something you like about the same person. You know there is a pattern, yet you like something about them. But the moment it goes really bad, you’re searching for answers as to why. And that is the craziest thing about women’s choices sometimes, is the scrambling for answers.

And in the end, that is the just of what women do at times when choosing a mate. You know in your gut things are bad. Yet at times, you will try to trick yourself into thinking otherwise. Whatever this person is providing you with outside what you need is keeping you there. And my best guess is that men who are worth being with and responsible are less passionate. We are taught to be providers, workers, productive, and efficient. Men not worth your time, bad boys, have no real ambition, goals, yet they are passionate in dating. Why, well it’s because they typically have nothing else they’re good at. So now women are left to choose between average passion and great man, or intense passion and shitty boyfriend.


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TRUTH BE TOLD: DO WOMEN REALLY WANT US ALL THE TIME?

“Do they really want us like we think they do?”


When observing monogamous relationships, we seem to think that it is men and not women who have a hard time being tied down. But, who’s to say that women really want to be with us. Or who’s to say they want us all the time. Women are typically the more emotional ones in the relationship, so we think that women are these sweet and innocent beings that only want us. Me, growing up around a lot of women in my life, you have enough conversations with them and realize that aspects of the previous statements regarding women are not all the way true. Well, you ask, what aspects of women am I referring to.

One of the aspects I am referring to is the notion that men are more sexual than women. Men are supposed to be more apt to cheat, but I think women think just as much as men do about infidelity. The only problem is that social norms in society frown on women being more sexual than men. But social norms and who we are biologically as humans are different. Women are expected to suppress feelings because it is socially immoral. Yet the internal feelings say something different. Women see plenty of men that they are attracted to, and yet never make a move. Now, outside of social norms, men generally are more impulsive while women observe a situation. But that’s the not the autonomous number of women and men.

Another aspect of women not being able to be at times who they truly want to be with us is the choosing method. When choosing a man, women would really prefer to be with someone who they love that loves them. But society tells you to be with a guy of a certain financial and educational means. You may not even want to be with this person, yet they have on paper what you are taught you should want from a man. I have always wondered do women really care, or do they “HAVE” to make excuses. Because women usually say, he doesn’t have this and this, but he has this other quality. Why do women have to point out the greater of what he does not have to uplift what he does have that is considered the lesser to where he could be in life. This has to do with a space of judging as well as biological.

I say biological because there is something very attractive about us as men when we are productive members of society. But it’s even more attractive to women when we start from nothing and build ourselves to something. Then again, society, once again, dictates a lot of how we live our lives. Women are expected to make excuses for what a guy lacks by stating he doesn’t have this, but has this. At times she really want to say, I wish he had this and this, so I wouldn’t have to choose between to the two (Oh, and by the way, it goes both ways). They would love to say, “Why can’t I be with a man who is successful in his career and can please me sexually.” Why must I say, “It aint all about the sex.” In reality she wants the sex and the career.

You see, in the end, women are expected to be the better of the two of us. They’re expected to be the moral compass of the relationship. It further feeds into the ideology of the woman’s way is the right way. Yet, since when is anyone right all the time. Sometimes she want you to be right about something. But when you live in a society that makes you feel like you are the face for what is right and wrong, where do you find time to be human? You need someone to be right in cases where you are wrong. You would really like to be overt sometimes, but you’re always expected to be nonverbal and passive. I will say that times are a lot different than in the past. But we still, even in a modern era, expect women to be the greater morally & ethically and the lesser sexually & emotionally.


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