MY MIND PLAYING TRICKS: THINKING YOU ARE NOT AS GOOD AS YOU ARE

Man Wearing Gray Sweater in Selective Focus Photography

“Mind F**K.”


why i hurt

I come from work from my overnight shift and go to sleep because it is still in the early A.M. And when I wake up it is usually in the morning in as well. How do I get myself motivated when my mind is rattled about when and where to start my day. This is something that comes across my mind on a daily basis. You start to feel like your mind is trying to destroy you from progressing in life. And that is a tough thing because you need your mind to exist. And your mind will be the launching pad that will propel you into success. So when it goes so does the ability to succeed.

the mirror doesn’t lie, your mind does

You ever stand in front of the mirror and look at yourself with disdain? The look that you don’t like what you see and that you are never going to be better than where you are now. That feeling of image as you look in the mirror will eventually turn into your reality. And the mirror will give you a literal interpretation of what you think of yourself. Only the mirror is not a trick mirror. You will slowly turn into the person you thought you were prior to what you have become. Your own physical embodiment will shift and now you are that person you hate. Trust and believe I know what that feeling is about and have been in that place.

uncertainty and unknown

Walking into the land of who knows what is a scary place to be. Because now you are trying to maneuver in a place where you are foreign. You don’t speak the language of the land and any form of communication means nothing. And I walk through this land, not because of the city where I dwell, but life. And that is why I feel like the mind is playing tricks. What I wake up intending to do and what I actually do sometimes is different. It’s like I am in a fight with myself because I don’t ever think I look as good as I look. I don’t think I am as smart as I am. So there is this constant battle with self until I am successful at what I do in life.


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HYPOCHONDRIACS: WHY DO WE WORRY SO MUCH ABOUT OUR HEALTH

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“I feel fine, but something must be wrong.”


Do you know of anyone that might fall under the term of hypochondriac? Or better yet, are you one of those people who fall under this term? Hypochondriacs for those that are unfamiliar, are people with almost an obsessive feeling of illness from an undiagnosed condition. They are people who get a stomach ache and right off the back they know for a fact that they are dying of some form of cancer. Or for me at least, I have lost quite a bit of hair, so now I have this feeling of, “Oh my God, am I getting sick?” Or is it that I need to adjust my sleeping patterns and the food I eat. Because we worry so much, especially now in society than at any other point in history. And there may be some explained reason as to why someone might obsess over the idea of getting sick and feeling like they are worse than their true problem.

One of the reasons is that as people who are hypochondriacs, we tend to be more aware than the average person. And when I say aware, the idea of your mortality constantly sits in the back of your mind. And knowing this gives you a sense of urgency, so you don’t want to check out of the world too soon before you can accomplish your goals in life. Yes, death is inevitable, and something none of us can control, but no one wants to die young. Especially if there is so much that you have not yet accomplished. We freak out at the very thought of someone telling us we are ill. But what is crazy about hypochondriacs is that not only is there nothing wrong, we tend to be completely fine. And worrying sometimes brings upon stress that makes us more ill than the illness we fear that is inside of us. But what is another reason for hypochondria.

We also freak out over the idea that we are sick because in some weird psychological way, it makes us seek attention. We are typically lone types of people and we want someone to feel sympathy for us. Yes, that is a very me driven mentality to have, but it is true. Our side might hurt, and we immediately think, “Oh my God, I have Kidney disease.” When in reality we might just have a slight pain that eventually goes away. But we want to actually be sick so people can treat us like a special case. Our loved ones will galvanize and crowd around us, giving us their prayers. Sometimes hypochondriacs envision our own funerals, and how everyone mourns over us, then we play back in our minds what happened in our lives that brought us to the point of sickness, that ultimately led to death.

It all sounds crazy, and you know what it is crazy. In the end, hypochondriacs tend to be quite self-centered and overly aware. We’re sensitive to everything from the natural world, to the language we use among each other as people. And our sicknesses are almost the confirmation that we need to say something is wrong. It comes from a place of emptiness in our lives. Because anyone who receives fulfillment in life is not constantly thinking about death. They know it is a reality and just deal. But our mortality and the understanding of our mortality creeps hypochondriacs out. Yet, with that awareness comes the need to accomplish goals because we know we are not here on Earth but for a temporary stay.


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