WE’RE ALL NUMBER 1: HOW SPORTS IS SUPPOSED TO TEACH US ABOUT LIFE

“Play hard or go home.”


teach them young

When your child is young, it is very important to teach them about winning and losing. Only problem is that in today’s society they are taught we are all winners. And this is just not so. You have to work hard to become a winner and work even harder to stay a winner. But once that changes we fail them. Sports is a great life lesson at an early age. You learn about not just winning and losing; you learn compromise, team efforts, competition, and how to deal with not being chosen. Tough for a child to comprehend, but it’s best they learn sooner than later.

everyone gets a trophy

Playing and winning a championship trophy is supposed to mean something. But when you are given something for just competing and that’s it, you could be setting a dangerous precedent. A trophy means you accomplished something. You were able to take on the best and defeat the best. It’s supposed to build confidence. But what is the purpose in handing them out if we all get one. Sure, there are going to be kids not as good as others. Here is where you find out what you’re good at in life. This is where you teach kids to realize their strengths and weaknesses. Not give them a false sense of confidence with ribbons that are 10th and 11th place.

there is no i in lost

Understand that you lost, but it was a team effort. There is no single person responsible for the lose. That is something to communicate to children as parents. We make them feel like they were out there alone. And the reality is, they are not. Even in a singular sport like track and field. There is a point system that even your single event contributes to overall. With that team support system they are able to also take that lose with grace.


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YOUR LIFE, YOUR PATH: HOW TO NAVIGATE YOUR WAY THROUGH ADULTHOOD

Man Standing on Brown Rocking Mountain Under Blue Sky and Yellow Sunlight

“Navigating life can be so tough.”


Living in real time, becoming an adult is seen as such a stretch in life when you’re a young kid. I still remember the days when my mother would walk in the house from work. I would be sitting in front of the television as she walked through the door. She’d head straight into the bathroom and get changed into her joggers andWoman in White Shirt Sleeping on Gray Fabric Sofa t-shirt. Coming back into the living room, she’d sit onto the couch and start to watch television as well. In that space and time, I knew my day would come to embark on my own journey in life. Yet at the time, I didn’t seem to quite know where that journey would lead. I just knew after age eighteen I would be out into the world.

 

 

Upon leaving high school, I went off to undergraduate school out of state, then transferring back home at the end of the first semester. After returning back home, I still didn’t quite know what I wanted to do in life, yet the timeachievement, cap, celebration was still ticking. My senior year was approaching and I still didn’t know what I wanted to do. But, I did have plans of going off to graduate school after undergrad. And then, May of 2011 was the year I would graduate college. I walked across that stage just as my two sisters had done in the past. And it would be just a few months later that I would be moving on. Moving out to New York City to attend graduate school for my MBA.

Now, did I really want to go off and work for an organization. Not really, so why did I attend graduate school for my Masters Degree? Well, coming out of undergrad, I started to write my very first screenplay. It was entitled, “Wood Road,” and would later be changed to “Retribution.” Not realizing Image result for screenplayhow hard it would be to write, it took me two and a half years to complete. Why, well for starters I didn’t attend film school. And second, I was so discouraged, I quit the first time writing for about one and half years. I just didn’t think I was good enough. Yet, I kept coming back to the script, time and time again. My mind could not focus, unless I was thinking about the script. Then I came back to the script, and finished it.

As I was writing the script, I started to write down all these ideas I had for screenplays. And the more I wrote, the more I realized this is what I wanted Railroad Tracks in Cityto do in life. So at the age of 24 years going on 25, I made the conscious decision to pursue a career as a screenwriter/filmmaker. And here is where
the path to success becomes quite murky. Because as a writer, there is no real path to take in life. It’s not like leaving med school, taking up a residency at a hospital. Or leaving law school getting recruited into a firm. There is no real time limit, nor a real guarantee of it working. All I knew is that I was new to this, don’t know if I’ll succeed, but I like it.

And from that point of liking it, I continued to write. Even writing and shooting my first short film, self-publishing two books, and starting a blog site. At an age where a lot of people are hanging on weekends at the club or Asphalt Road Near Trees Under White Sky at Daytimefocusing on a monogamous relationships, I am producing film, writing my books, and contributing to a blog. What’s tough is that who knows if I’ll succeed. And that is the scary part. No one wants to work toward something just for it blow up in the their faces. We work hard with the hopes of things panning out. And as much as you’re taught that your best may not be good enough, it still doesn’t sink into the mind. Not until you actually fail.

And in the end, that’s the hardest part about life, is the failure. The majority of people go to work, get their checks every two weeks, and live like this for life until retirement. Yet when you step outside that box and try something, you don’t want to be the one people laugh at for failing. You don’t want to Person Doing Cliff Diving during Daytimebe the one people said I told you so. What’s funny is that sometimes those people as well as others secretly wish they were you at times. Throwing yourself off a cliff; taking that leap of faith. But the way I see it, it’s better to jump and see what happens, than to never jump and wonder what could have been.


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MAKING YOUR OWN LUCK: HOW TO OPEN YOUR OWN DOORS TO SUCCESS

Image result for SUCCESS

“Don’t wait for someone else, you make you.”


So many people in the United States have a hard time securing themselves a spot in our economy. They live their daily lives not doing what it is they want to do. Working dead end jobs and working just to have enough money to exist. Then there are the people who step out into society and make things happen for themselves. And the question now stands, “What separates the people who stepped out versus the others? Was it some form of talent that the other didn’t possess, was it the opportunities, or was it the willingness to not give in and give up. The answer is all of the above. But more so, you have to be willing to make your own luck.

What does that mean to make your own luck? Especially in a society where we have become so dependent on one way of succeeding in America, now that focus has shifted. And if you can’t shift with the focus you get left behind. The factories where automobiles were manufactured is a prime example of the focus shifting and to a more automation driven workplace. People were so used to a daily task that when the task changed to a more informational base/engineering base, people have a hard time shifting. Others see this as how societies have always shifted. So they just roll with the punches. But what I just said is still not enough information to make your own luck.

Let’s say you have a skill in teaching. You know that finding a good teaching job is tough. There are so many internet web portals where teachers are making an extra income working for themselves. They are building their resumes this way until something comes along. Tutoring multiple students counts as work history. It will show not only can you command a student’s attention, but your initiative to put yourself out there proves you could make a good educator. Or, let’s say you want to get into the medical field at a great hospital. But getting a job at this hospital is so tough. Try to work at a small clinic and build credibility with a community. Or try working overseas at a clinic in a poor village. You are not making much money, but you will learn to appreciate patients and medicine outside the monetary until you can get to that point.

All of this is hard because people say things  like, “You have better opportunities because you grew up with money.” “I was born to a certain economic situation.” “I am a minority and no one will hire me.” Fine, let’s say I am empathetic to your plight, now what. What is expected next? And that’s just it, what next. You grew up poor, minority, and poor education system. But there has to be a what are you looking for in this momentary position. Meaning, I grew up poor, I am an adult now. What do you expect someone to do for you today? For instance, I grew up the first 18 years broke, I am 30 years old now. Now I have nothing to show, but it was because I grew up poor. Ok, today is Friday, what are you hoping to expect Monday morning. Most people will say a job.

Ok, we are getting somewhere, a job. Then I ask what can you do, what do you do, and what have you done lately. This is when you hear crickets. Because people say it’s hard to get a job when you need work experience to get a job. So with that said how do I make my own luck. Well for starters, work experience is not necessarily a paid employment position. And a job is an ambiguous term, what position and title. Like my previous post, I spoke about self awareness being needed to make your own luck. If you are aware of self, you know the job title, income range, time on average to attain what it is you want. With that said, you can make something out of what seems like nothing. But when you have no awareness of what you’re good at, what are you good for. “I want a job,” you say; then I say, “What are your skills?” Nothing formulates after that with some people.

In the end, making your own luck comes from self awareness, willingness to not give in, accepting failure, and willing to start from somewhere. People only look at the finished outcome and judge based on that alone. There is some regular man or woman walking the street now, and we see them as normal. Once they hit a stride in their careers, we go, how. What you should do is ask people on their path to something, then once you see the finished product you can understand how they got there. But as long as you go you’re successful, it’s this, you miss all that in between work when no one knew who they were. It was the in between work of failures, living broke, consistency that landed them on their success path. Because experience is a broad term, yet that is what they were gaining, experience. They didn’t have dollars, but they had experience over you.


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HOOP DREAMS: WHY SPORTS IS THE TICKET FOR BLACK MALES

Image result for hoop dreams

“A gone make it!”

“With the number one pick, of the NBA/NFL draft, the ________ select _______ of the University of ________.” These are the words young boys dream of hearing as we prepare to walk that stage, receiving that hat from the commissioner. Then soon after, celebrating with family as we bask in the glory of making to the league. Our dreams have come true and we can start our career. Now these are the experiences the very few will get a chance to see. As for the rest, it is just a dream which will never come true. But is that really the end. I mean with so many young boys dreaming and only a limited amount of space, only a chosen few will get a chance to even get drafted. Even fewer will play and fewer will have lengthy careers.

But why, why are so many Black males wrapped up in the idea that sports is the way out of poverty. There use to be a lyric in hip hop artist Notorious B.I.G. rhymes, “You either slangin rocks or got a killer jump shot.” Could it be that we aspire to play ball because so many Black men are in the league that we see. Black men are in other career fields, but these are the public figures we see. And we only want to be the men we see and seek to become who we see as making big in their careers. There are Black doctors, lawyers, engineers, executives, but we want to be the ball player. But could it all be about seeing these men. What about income?

Income has caught the attention of so many Black boys because what other career is this lucrative this young. Name any other profession where a 19 to 22 year old could become an overnight millionaire. Especially a young Black man from an inner city neighborhood. The only guys that age with a lot of money are the drug dealers. It’s one of the reasons we purchase the items we do once we get money, almost as a homage to these guys. We also think that money will fix so many of our problems that we try to escape from when we were poor. But why is sports so shoved down the throats of Black boys. Even with knowing the majority won’t go pro.

One of the reasons is that winning high school games makes the school and coach look good. So Black males have dreams pumped into their heads about being the next Jordan or Kobe or Lebron. Yet no one is telling Black boys to focus on more academics. In today’s society the idea of a college degree is thrown our way. But you don’t need basketball/football to go to college. So academics take a backseat to sports. And what happens, so many Black boys read at levels that kids half their age are reading. Which leads to so many Black males majoring in communications once we get to college. It’s one the easiest, yet one the most vague degrees in school.

In the end, we are pushed to play sports because no one expects you to do anything else. Young White males are not pumped up with sports on a daily basis. Plus, we are also inundated with constant images of successful White men in other career fields. As a matter of fact, the entire Forbes rich list are comprised with majority White males. To White guys, sports is fun, as a career objective, there are fewer. Young Black boys should be exposed to more as children to know more is out there. That’s why Barack Obama played such a pivotal role in the image of Black males. Now more than ever politics is an attractive career path for Black males. An environment which will effect Black males more than any athlete can effect change.

Losing Mentalities

“I’ve been meaning to, I’ve been wanting to, I’ve always wanted to, I’ve been thinking about….”

It’s interesting how so many people want to be successful, but they are not willing to put in the time. The same line comes from their mouths: I’m thinking about or I’ve had this idea to. It never formulates into anything that leads anywhere. There is a reason why because they never were going to do it anyways. For some odd reason people have this mentality that is either a losing mentality or the idea of living in this fantasy world. They sit around and daydream about what they could be, yet never put in the time to make it work. It took me until I became an adult to realize that some people are not meant to do well in life. Some people need the conformity in their lives where they’re being told what to do.

Then you have the bunch that just won’t do anything even getting a job being bossed around. What do I mean a job being bossed around and told what to do. I’m talking about not following your passion. Where are you here on earth? What is it you’re meant to do. There are so many who will live their entire lives; their 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, and even 90’s never knowing what their life truly meant. But you have one life on this planet and one life only. Make it count because when those lights go out they go out forever. So what is keeping people from pursuing their true passions.

A strong reason that points to so many people not living to their full potential is family and friends. You would think fear plays a role, yet that is such a small aspect. We live in fear, mainly of failure. But failure is one of those things that only is a given, but expected and accepted. Plus that failure is worth it if you learn from your lesson the second time around. The thing with family is a few hurdles you run into. Number one, you assume that since it’s coming from friends and family, then they must be giving you advice that’s good for you. Yes and no. Yes because these are the people in your life who look out for you most. On the other hand friend and family or neither; no one should push you into a path unless they know you internally. Meaning, if they don’t know what drives you as well as you skills you possess, then it’s an assumption. Now you can follow their guidance, but if you do and aren’t content with the outcomes it’s your fault. Because ultimately it’s your life. And no one wants to claim responsibility for your unhappiness.

Number two reason, if you are taught to listen to your family, especially parents, disobeying your family may be a good or bad decision. And that is something no one tells you about being an adult and following your dreams. Sometimes you may have to disobey to be happy in life. That ultimate freedom and happiness cannot be replaced with any amount of money on earth. You want ti still be able to care your yourself, but no amount of money is worth your happiness.