MONEY CAN’T BUY ME LOVE: HOW HAPPY ARE YOU REALLY WITH MONEY

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“Happiness is an internalized feeling due to_________.”


Growing up, my household was classified based on my mother’s yearly income as below the poverty level. I didn’t feel like an impoverished family, but we really were below the poverty level. To me, I thought poverty meant sleeping in the street or eating at a soup kitchen. I didn’t realize at my young age you could work and have a roof over your head, yet still be impoverished. This was hard for me to realize because so many around me were worse off than my sisters and myself. So in my life I wanted to be the opposite of poor which is rich. But as I came through my twenties, my views gave me a different perspective.

Coming into my twenties I started to realize what I really wanted out of life. I wanted to be able to have a voice to express my myself how I wanted. And that didn’t mean behaving like a loose cannon, not having regard for active, activity, beachanyone. Because at the end of the day we all have to answer to someone. I just wanted to express myself in the most rational way without having to choose a side in life and sticking to that side. In addition to that, I said if I could find a way to make at least $60,000 per year it would be enough to start my self employment journey. Now with that said, what does anything I have said in this passage have to do with money and happiness? A lot, there is a lot to be said about money and happiness.

Because notice above that I didn’t say I would be happier if I had more money. I said I would be happier having the ability to express myself and Full Frame Shot of Eyehave a salary to do so. Meaning anything beyond that point is just added bonus. But there is nothing that would make me happier having a lot of money if it weren’t aligned with what I want to do for a living. It’s much more than money. Because if it were only about money my professional choice would not be writing. If it’s about money, we all know you work hard and run to Wall Street. Stock Brokers, Hedge Fund Managers, or the guys in the tech space; you don’t choose to become a writer. Writing is something you love to do.

So what is it about people who think that if they had more money they would be happier? A lot of it has to do with their current quality of life. When you have money, it’s hard to explain to people who don’t have money how unhappy you could potentially be. They can only see their lives and anyone who is above them looks good. They can’t and most likely will never see it your way. But studies have been conducted on lottery winners who have won major jackpots. There are times their happiness actually decreased because they became more isolated and people were hitting them up for money all the time. So it actually produces diminishing returns over time.

In the end, quality of life is key to the happiness. But that is not just money alone that contributes to that good feeling. And also happiness is how you go about gaining your money. The climb is important because once you get to where you are, you can look over time at the build-up. Usually Man Standing on Brown Rocking Mountain Under Blue Sky and Yellow Sunlightpeople who got it all at once lose it as well. They’re not prepared to deal with the responsibilities of having money now. So before you make money, have an idea of what you truly want out of life. Money can buy you tangibles, but what keeps you going day in and day out is something different.


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UNPAID POSITIONS: HOW WORKING FOR NOTHING CAN FORMULATE INTO SOMETHING

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“Sometimes you have to set your sights low to aim high.”


When you are young, you look at people who have all these things in life that you want. But you don’t know sometimes how to get to that point in life. One of the ways to get that point where you are enjoying the life you want, you must first crawl through dirt to get there. And more times than not, you must take low pay to no pay. I was watching radio personality, author, and co-host of the morning show The Breakfast Club’s Charlamagne Tha God on a video post from the show Uncommon Sense on MTV. He was being asked questions by political analyst and business strategist Angela Rye surrounding young people landing a good career.

He was speaking about how he first got his big break on the Wendy Williams show as a co-host. The job came with no pay, but gave him the radio experience he needed to further his goals. And the problem a lot of times when you’re young, you don’t want to work for low pay, must less no pay. But, what you don’t understand about the people who came before you, some of them worked for nothing when they first started. And what’s interesting, those jobs allow you more space to do you because you’re working for no money. Less restrictions on you to do what it is you love to do. And that gig leads into another and into another and into another. And while everyone else is looking for that dream job, you landed it building your experience.

So why are people so apprehensive to work for low pay to no pay. Because they not only don’t want to because of a lack of monetary gain, but also because of social stigmas. If you are working for low to no pay, you’re obviously not doing anything with your life. So you don’t want to sit in a social circle with people who are working for a living and you don’t have money. The reality is that life is long, and their immediate income, may not outweigh your long term income. Meaning, they take the $30,000 per year job performing a task while you take the $10 to $15 per hour gig building experience. As time pass, you not only catch up, but surpass them; how so?

You surpass them because they are usually not working a job that builds experience. The majority of people work a job that is task based. They perform a task everyday and not experience. Meaning, working in a factory for $20 per hour on a particular machine is not work experience. It’s performing a task each day. And when that task is no longer of use, you’re of no use anymore. So building experience is bigger because you climb based on your experience and expertise, not how many hours you work or how long you been on a job. People seem to think I come to work everyday that means I have work experience. No, you have task experience, work experience is your direct value to a company based on your performance that aids the organization in growth.

In the end, your goal is to build your experience for years then build your income. There is a process to attaining what you want. But we live in such an immediate society that people think it is a now thing. Being young and working a long time on a job means 6 – 8 months in today’s society. When in reality, your experience is a 7 – 10 year climb itself. Then you build income there after. But most want a job now while others build. I was taught suffer early and hopefully you’re still young when you prosper.


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VISION: WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF

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“Ever get upset because they don’t know quite like you know?”

It’s tough when you close your eyes and you see that something. That something in life that no one else sees but you. It’s tough because a vision is only seen by the person and no one else until there is an execution of the vision. Ever go to sleep and wake up with an explanation of what you dreamt about? People look you in the face and have that confused stare. In your mind you see a vivid fantasy world, but to them you just sound utterly ridiculous. So why? Why is it so hard for the people around you, or even the people you try to convince in society to invest in you and your vision?

For starters, people want to know that you are serious about your craft. The dominant society could care less because to them you’re just another young man or woman with a pipe dream. They ignore because we all know that most won’t attempt to execute the plan. It will wind-up being some distraction that allows people to continue to go through life existing. And existing is easier than executing because there is less risk of failure and heartache. Which is another reason it’s hard for people to recognize your vision. They know that most will give up and quit from the level of difficulty.

Which brings us to the next reason why it’s hard for people to see your vision. All talk and no movement. Most people talk a good game, but then it’s time to execute, its a totally different ball game. Sitting in front of people sharing all these visions is easy when you’re actually putting in the work. Talking it up is good and everything, but what about the time put into the project. That’s when the excuses start to arise. “You see, I have to work.” “I need it to be perfect.” Its like what are you waiting for, winning the lottery. Create something, anything to give people an insight into what you’re trying to do in life. But we all know in the end you were never going to do it anyways. Something like I said before, keeping you distracted from your daily existence.

But there is another side to the vision not being seen by others. There is the hate you receive because someone does not possess the talents you do. To a degree, we know some true talent when we see it. And if someone has traveled down your road and it didn’t work for them, they will give you all the reasons not to yourself. It’s almost as if they are silently saying, “I tried it, and I know I’m better than you.” “And if it didn’t work for me, I know you’re not going to perform well.” These are people who are the result of not having the it factor they thought they possessed. They thought in their minds, I know I’m great, but it didn’t quite pan out that way. So the taste of soar grapes fill the inside of their mouths just hearing you explain your vision.

This brings me to my last reason why it’s so hard for others to see your vision. Why is it so hard? Because maybe, just maybe you’re not that good at what you are doing. There was a famous quote by Helen Keller where she stated, “I would have rather to have been born blind than to have sight and lack vision. Everything in our minds sound great, but what about to the masses. I challenge you to create something. Then put it out there for the world to consume. Most people can’t deal with the rejection, requiring them to go back and get better. That’s at times what they need is to get better. But the ego gets in the way and leads to the demise of their potential growth.

In the end, we all just want someone to believe in us. Believe in whatever it is that motivates us to wake up each and every day. That thing, that burning feeling, that internal sensation that gets us going. That felling when you can see it, taste, and now all you have to do know is touch it. But that vision most often must be cultivated and grown by not just you, but people willing to invest in your ideas. My advice, start small, work it, and rework; then rework it, and rework some more. And once you’ve done that rework it some more. Because a vision, without the combination of consistency and a lack of clear goals lead to resentment. Ultimately it will manifest itself in how you see yourself and how you live your life.

GIFTS: How So Many Of Us Miss Our Calling

“What is your purpose?”

Gifts, we all have them, but not the one, one receives on holidays. I’m talking about the gift given to you in life. Some people spend their entire lives not utilizing their gifts. Whether its because of a personal fear or our outside influences. Having a gift and not using it is not only robbing yourself but others of great opportunities. Well, what opportunities?

What about the knowledge that is not used. You know how many Albert Einsteins have been born since Einstein, yet never attempted to engage in anything remotely scientific. Imagine where this country could be scientifically. Or better yet, there is a Steve Jobs working a nine to five that he/she hates. For whatever reason they refuse to attempt at using that gift. Imagine where we could also be technologically. Steve Jobs believed that those feel they can change the world most often do change the world.

And sometimes it’s not all math and science. Look at Martin Luther King Jr. What if he was not interested in human rights? What if Michael Jordan had not have picked up a basketball? You see, a gift is something precious. I can’t fully explain it in words. But it’s this feeling that I have to do this in life. It’s my duty, my calling. Initially, its hard for people to see, but in time they will. It’s hard to get people to see what thy can’t see. Why is that? What’s it about your gift, that people can’t initially see? Well, the problem is that its not a gift to others, but your vision. Telling people your calling is this vague existence. You say, to people, you go, “I have a calling to be a humanitarian.” People say, “Quiet, go get a day job.” Now at this stage you have a choice. Should you take this advice? Or, should you pursue your interest?

This is a tough stage, go through with the gift or quite. Now, in my opinion, I say go for the gusto. Because when the lights go out they’re out forever. You only get one at bat, make it count. That’s the inspirational words, but what about the reality. What about not achieving your goal. How many people can live with not reaching that point where others can see the gift? What a painful feeling to be working so hard just to be let down in the end. But see to me, it’s worth it. Go for it all even in the face of failure. Because I can live with failure, but what I can’t live with is not trying at all.