“It’s either I do, or I won’t continue.”
Women have always sought out to be wives. Even as young girls they are raised to find themselves a husband. They’re taught that you’re short changing yourself by settling for dating. But the things that women want pertaining to marriage are basic. So basic, do you really need marriage. Or was marriage designed and asked for, for different reasons other than the love. Because love is something you have which brought you to the marriage. There isn’t anymore, the love you have is the love you have. You’re not biologically this new person after you marry that you weren’t when you were not married. So what is it that you become? Can’t be about responsibility because you must be responsible prior to the marriage.
Marriage is the paperwork, not the love. What do I mean by the paperwork? Well, let’s first look at what marriage is in the first place. Marriage is the contractual obligation of bringing together of finances to assess if the relationship will last for the long term. Meaning, laying claims to assets in the case the relationship does not pan out. Which is a huge indicator into why women so desperately want to marry instead of dating. Women say it’s love or in the eyes of God, but it’s really in the event something happens to the man she can continue to live after he is gone. Now when I say live I don’t mean she is unemployed and he is the breadwinner. Even if she has a career along with him, her one income can not sustain the life of both when he was alive.
All of this makes sense considering woman would have to go through someone else if the man gets sick or dies. And what do I mean by going through someone else. I mean that if you and a man are not married you not considered in a lot of places next of kin; especially if he has siblings and/or parents alive. You may be put into a situation that they are able to dictate to you in the event something happens to him. You’re concerned with moving forward, while they are more concerned with a new man replacing their son or sibling. It could actually wind-up stalling your further progress in your own life.
So in the end, why don’t women just say what the real reason they want marriage is for; shame, that’s why. We shame women in society for being real in their intentions. We call them gold diggers for expressing what they want to marry for, a comfortable lifestyle. So they say love and compassion, yet you don’t need to marry for those reasons. We stigmatize them so much that they must now recontextualize what they want to fit into our male dynamics to make us happy. It’s why women make excuses of, “He may not have this and this, but he has this.” They lie about what they want because they don’t want to be judged on the truth. Yet they negatively effect our lives by manifesting what they lie about because they feel a moral obligation to please us in a male dominated environment.